Chez Lynne

What I Did on My Summer Vacation

2006-10-22T10:03:00.000-05:00

Twilight 8K

It's about friggin' time! This is my attempt to get back into my beloved blogging world. This title is a little late but oh well.

One of the main things I did this summer (other than teach and work on my thesis papers) was run. I ran a lot in an attempt to train for a half-marathon. This is one of the first races of the summer that I participated in. It was actually fun despite the horrible heat. I ran it with my friend, Diane and it was a blast. And we finished! and survived!!

Ghosts of Gettysburg

2006-10-22T10:02:00.001-05:00

Ghost Tour

This is a picture from the fabulous ghost tour we took in Gettysburg. Even though we didn't catch anything on our camera and didn't have a ghostly experiences the stories told during the tour were so interesting. It was a good tine.

Best. Day trip. Ever!

2006-10-22T10:02:00.000-05:00

Gettysburg

In June Zak and I went to Gettyburg, Pa. and it was so much fun!! Here's me in front of one of the canons that marks one of the battlefields. Gettysburg did make me realize that I now NOTHING about American History. I can recite the ins and outs of the French Revolution but How did I miss all this great gorey American history?

It was such an intersting place. We ate at a supposedly haunted Inn/Restaurant and went on a ghost tour. So much fun!

I'm Cursed

2006-10-22T10:01:00.000-05:00

Lurray Caverns

It never fails. I always have the worst 4th of Julys and this year was no different. Zak and I had a long holiday weekend and decided we'd travel to Richmond, VA as well as Leesburg, Va to check out some of the haunted tours. We started out on our journey...it took us about 4 hours to go 60 miles so we gave up and came home. So instead of Richmond and Leesburg we decided to visit the Lurray Caverns instead. Luckily this allowed us to avoid a lot of traffic but the Caverns were still packed!! We waited in line forever to enter just to be stuck underground with droves of people and then waited in line forever to exit. Oh well. It was still kinda cool and now I can cross this tourist spot off my list.

But this horrible weekend did seal my thought that I am always cursed on the 4th of July holiday. Next year I'm ordering take out, renting tons of DVDS, and spending the whole weekend in my apartment in front of the air conditioner.

Mackinac Island

2006-10-22T10:00:00.001-05:00

Mom's B-Day

I also drove to Michigan for my Mom's birthday in August. I hadn't been home in a while so it was a nice drive and a fun time. Except for the fact that my mom now has birds...noisy birds...that woke me up at 5 AM every friggin' morning with their cheerful chirping. Stupid Birds.

Luckily we spent the rest of the week at Mackinac Island-my Mom's favortie place on earth. It's this Island near the Mackinac Bridge that has banned all motor vehicles. So it's super quaint and we stayed at a cute bed and breakfast and rode bikes and ate tons of ice cream. I also ran around the Island as part of my training (8 miles). This picture was taken a couple hours after. My mom and sister are actually holding me up but the pic still turned out nice.

After this I travelled to SW Michigan to my sister's house...to run some more.

Worst. 10K. Ever.

2006-10-22T10:00:00.000-05:00

Wayland 10K

As I mentioned I did A LOT of running this summer to train for my half-marathon (pictures of that to come soon). This is a race I ran with my sister and brother-in-law (old running pros) in their town. I ran by best pace ever this race (10K in 1 hour and 5 minutes) but it was because I knew I was dead last and I was trying to bust ass to the finish line the entire time. My finish time would have been better but I got confused and lost a couple times-not because it was a confusing course but because I was delerious with fatigue. It was horrible.

So that was my summer in a nut shell. The rest was pretty uneventful. I worked on my thesis, started teaching again in August, and ran my half-marathon in Spetember.

Accidental Blogging Hiatus

2006-04-18T12:25:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm not dead. Maybe some of you thought the poodles finally did me in but, nope, I'm still here and ready to jump back on the blogging band wagon. I can't beleive I was gone so long! It's been so busy here that I really let my blogging slide-but no more!!!
So here's what been keeping me MIA for so long:

1. Running. I'm just too tired do anything after my runs. Not even type. I've upped my usual route to 5 miles. Last week I ran aver 20 miles!

2. Work. It's nearing the end of the semester, which is always the busiest time for me. In addition to the usual lectures and preperations there are Quizzes, Finals, and papers. Just as much work for me as it is for them. I'm pretty sure I put more effort into grading these things than the kids actually put into studying or writing.

3. Trip plans. I've decided to plan a study abroad trip for my students so that's causing a lot of extra work too. Lots of hoops to jump through and all that.

4. Visits from family. Right after Zak's parents left my sister came for a visit. Atleast this is a fun distraction but a distraction none-the-less.

5. Thesis. Yeah, I'm still working on that and trying to get done by August. Keep your fingers crossed!!

Really, now that I've written this it doesn't seem like so much. Pretty much I'm a blogging slacker and need to get my act together.

5 days and I still don't look like Jessica Simpson

2006-04-18T12:19:00.000-05:00

So I've finally succomb to all the celebrity endorsments and commercials on televesion and purchsed a trial sample of Proactive-that skin cleaning stuff. I've always had a love/hate relationship with my skin...when it looks good-it looks good. But most of the time it's ruddy and I'm forever breaking out. So, I thought, hey, if it works for P-diddy, Vanessa Williams, Jessica Simpson, and all those poor people with severe acne that it should work for me right?

Well, I don't think I'll be added to the list of success stories. First, even though it did seem to clear up my skin slightly after the first couple uses, it dried out my skin, A LOT, and made it really tight and itchy. So, I decided I would only use it a couple times a week. Well, I tried to use it again on Sunday and it burned so bad that I had to wash it off. Alas, I guess I wasn't meant to look like Jessica Simpson.

I've Always Depended on the Kindness of Strangers

2006-04-18T12:12:00.000-05:00

A couple of Fridays ago (actually the Friday before my 6K race)I was doing my usual run around my neighborhood and suddenly a minivan stopped right in front of me. A lady hung out the window waving her arms and signaling for me to take my ear phones out. So I obliged, thinking she need directions. Instead she told me how she lives down the street and that she's me out running everyday and goes on and on about how proud she is of me and how much weight I've lost. Then she finshed by giving me a cravy thumbs up wave and drove off.

I was amazed. First I didn't realize people were starting to recognize me around the neighboorhood and second, I really don't think I've lost that much weight. It was probably just because it was a warm day and I actually got to wear a t-shirt and light pants rather than the snow pants, sweatshirts, and ski-mask I had to wear during the winter.

But either way, it's nice to get recognition and it was really nice of the lady to stop and give a complete stranger kudos. I wish I had someone around me that noticed all the hard work I was doing like a boyfriend or a hus...oh wait...

Sligo 6K

2006-04-18T11:53:00.001-05:00

6k6

Here are me and my good friend, Diane before starting our 6K. Look how cocky I look...little did I know...

Worst Part of the Race. Ever.

2006-04-18T11:53:00.000-05:00

6k5

This was the worst part of the race because I thought I was almost done and then Zak yelled at me that I still had another full loop to go. He's lucky he was so far away or I would have kicked his ass. Plus it didn't help that by this time I was being lapped by the real runners and that the speed walkers and the 90 year old were about a half mile ahead of me. I really though me and the 90 year old were going to have a battle royale to the finish but no...he kicked my ass.

Why I should carry a Diffibulator with Me

2006-04-18T11:52:00.001-05:00

6k4

After the race...this picture is kind of a joke...and kind of not. And no jokes about my big fat ass please, that's just too easy.

Endorphins not kicking in fast enough

2006-04-18T11:52:00.000-05:00

6k3

We're Cute-In a kind of sweaty, tired, disgusting kind of way

2006-04-18T11:51:00.000-05:00

6k2

This is the moment that I finally forgive Diane for talking me into this and decide that I won't egg her house after all.

Feeling Cocky Again

2006-04-18T11:50:00.000-05:00

6k1

See, this is what is wrong with running. After 10 or 15 minutes the pain starts to go away, you're able to breath again, and the endorphins start kicking in. You think you had a good time...BUT YOU DIDN'T!! And then you sign up for something else and the whole ordeal starts all over again until your true friends have an intervention and take you Chipotle. If that's not a cry for help I don't know what is...

Car Troubles-Now Over

2006-03-22T12:48:00.000-05:00

zoom,zoom,zoom

After all my complaining about my recent car troubles I wanted to let you all know that they are officially over. Zak and I got a new car! We're still in panic mode from spending such a big chunk of our budget but it's worth it...especially since this means we won't be spending the big chunk on fixing a crappy car but instead put it towards a new shiny one.

It's also our first new car...ever. Our parents never bought new cars either so it's kind of weird. After tons of arguments and weeks of searching and test driving and having to beat over zealous salespeople off with sticks we decided to go with a black Mazda3. It gets great gas milleage and has a nice warranty. Which means no more car blog posts for about 4 years. Whew!

Tag-I'm it

2006-03-21T09:36:00.000-05:00

I've been tagged by AB and Stacy so I guess I'd better get crackin'.

The rules are, once you've been tagged you have to write a blog with 6 weird things/habits about yourself. In the end you need to list 6 other people to tag and list their names. Don't forget to leave a comment saying "You've been tagged" in their comments and tell them to read your blog.

Here we go:

1. My OCD tendencies rear their ugly head at night. Before I go to bed I have to check the door lock at least twice, the stove, and all the burners, and then I usally make Zak go check them again anyways just to be sure. We've never left the door unlocked and the stove was left on only once for about an hour but for some reason I think each night is going to be the night that the crazy neighbor across the hall comes into our apartment to torture us and it will only end when he switches on a light and the apartment explodes from one of the burners being left on.

2. I have an extremely loud laugh and it only gets louder when I'm nervous. We went to a party the other night and I was insane with the laughing. I'm pretty sure I got some weird/dirty looks but I just can't help it.

3. I like to set my radio stations according to specific numerical codes that, for the most part, only I can understnd. For example, 101.1 is the #1 setting on my radio and 95.5 is set at, of course #5 but 107.3 is actually set at #2 because if you add 1+7+3=11 and 1+1=2 and 106.7 is set at #3 because 6+7=13 and 1+3=4 and then you minus the 1 and it's 3...yeah, crazy weird...I know. There's a movie loosely based on me,you know...it's called "A Beautiful Mind". I say loosely because I'm not smart like the main character but everything else is pretty close.

4. I like to set my groceries in catogories when I place them on the conveyor belt to get scaned. Such as all frozen food together, all boxes together, all produce together. I say it's to be nice to the cashier bagging my goods (ha! bagging my goods-I'm naughty) but really it's because I'm weird. And I'm starting to think my OCD is rearing it's ungly head other than at night...

5. I don't think I can live without cable anymore. I've been without it for the the majority of my life but recently I've become addicted to watching reruns of my old favortie tv shows. I follow The Gilmore Girls, the X-files, and Little House on the Prairie on a regular basis even though I've seen all the episodes about a million times already.

6. Okay, last one. Gotta make this a good one...I don't know how to walk in heels. Well, walk in heels and not look like a total idiot that's struggling to walk in heels. It's too bad because I've recently bought a couple pairs of really cute shows with heels but I rarely wear them because I hate wobbling around like a newborn fawn.

7. I decided to add an extra one for shits and giggles: my closet is color coded. Is that strange or do other people do this too? I got the idea the first time I went to Europe and all the cute boutiques were seperated into colors.

I tag anyone who wants to copy this...sorry, suddenly got distracted...must go organize shoes in planetary alignment...

Spring "Break"

2006-03-21T09:29:00.000-05:00

It's spring break for my school and, as always, I'm totally wasting time that should be spent drunk and shirtless on a beach. I never did the spring break thing-even when I was a student-so I'm thinking next year I'm going to make up for lost time...

However, this year it's the same old, same old. I put the word break in qotes since I'm not even considering it a real vacation. Sure, I didn't have to teach this whole week but instead I just spent 10 hours grading exams and calculating mid-term grades and now my in-laws will be here in about 24 hours. Which means mad-dash cleaning, stocking up on pain-killers, and practicing smiling through sideways insults and complaining. Keep your fingers crossed that it won't end in a bizarre murder, murder, murder, suicide.

Ahhhh...good times.

Happy Birthdy Christine!!!

2006-03-19T09:50:00.000-05:00

It's one of my favorite blogger friends' birthday: Christine!!!

I hope you have a great day and someone makes you a Bonney Butter Cake and you give yourself a day off from your healthly lifestyle and that Isaac takes you to a fancy concert in New York and you go to a fun restaurant and eat lots of weird food that I would never eat and then tell me all about it...

Happy Birthday!!!

Temporary Insanity

2006-03-04T23:22:00.000-05:00

Well, it's finally happened...I've finally had my most serious bout with temporary insanity and signed up for a half marathon in Virginia Beach schedule for Labor Day weekend.

My good friend (and I'm beginning to think bad influence) talked me into it. I keep trying to tell myself that it's going to be fun and that it'll be worth the pain but those thoughts are often broken up by fits of panic about dehydration, overhydration, and not being able to finish in the maximum 4 hours. Yikes, I'd better. I don't want to be running/walking/crawling for 4 hours. But it sounds like we signed up for a good first 1/2 marathon. It's advertised as a flat course and they have rock bands set up every couple of miles so I'll get to hear music and won't get bored even when my friend leaves me in the dust when I collaspe at mile 5.

Okay, I might even be able to finish...as long as the race is devoid of the following things:

1. Dogs. I usually love dogs but I've always had trouble with dogs on my jogging routes (see this post)and this year has been no exception. I have recently lengthened my route to include a large black, wolf-looking doggie that looks like he could totally jump over the fence that encloses his yard. In fact whenever I run by he makes sure to lunge at me right when I'm least expecting it and then dangle his paws over the fence. I know he's thinking "you're lucky lady. I could get over this fence if I really wanted to but I already ate someone today. But next time you come around here you'd better hope you can make it home without a neck." And of course I still run past the demented poodles. Right now they're content with barking at me from their doilleyed couch but I know, one of these days, it won't be enough. Again, I repeat, these poodles look crafty and I'm pretty sure if they ever get ambitious enough to come outside the authorities won't ever find my body.

2. Rolled up newpapers. I trip over one at least once a week. I'm starting to think it's the same one that's stalking me and positioning itself right where it knows I'll step. There's one that is especially dangerous-it's been rained on, frozen, and baked in the sun for so long that it's hard as a brick and is now totally camoflagued into the grass. Luckily the last time I tripped on it I was on my 3rd mile so I wasn't going fast enough to actually fall and hurt myself but I'm waiting...it's going to happen soon.

3. A Chipotle. 'Cause I can't friggin pass one of those places without stopping.

4. Hills. Hills are the devil. They defy space and time because it takes me twice the energy and time to get up one but it's actually half the distance. Sadly, I have about 5 hills the size of Everest on my route. The last one feels like it goes straight up.

5. Wind, heat, or severe cold. All three happened last week and I've decided I just can't take it. Tuesday it was such a warm afternoon and I couldn't tell that while in my apartment so I totally overdressed and had to strip while I ran. Then I just gave up and walked the rest of the way before I had heat stroke. Then Friday morning it was so cold that I couldn't feel ANYTHING except for the copius amounts of snot running out of my nose. I've resorted to carrying a handkerchief because the last time I carried mere Kleenexes they had been blown to bits the first half mile. And today, well today it was so windy I think people confused my attempt at excersice for a Marcel Marceau bit. Again, I had to give up early than usual because I wasn't actually running anywhere!

So as long as it's perfect weather and someone carries me I should be all set...

Night Watch ++++

2006-03-04T22:47:00.000-05:00

Okay, my plus sign mean nothing because I really just put however many I think look good rather than relating to any kind of real rating system. Plus I just want to copy Stacy because she's a movie rating hero of mine.

I went to see this movie last weekend and even though it got horrible reviews from real movie conniseurs, I, of course, enjoyed it a lot. The story is a basic one about good vs. evil but the visuals were great, and again, it was about vampires and that kind of fantasy crap so I ate it up. It's also part of a trilogy so that is fun too since in the next movie it will be from the "evil" group's point of view. Oh, and it was Russian, so there were subtitles but I actually enjoy that sometime-especially since it's so much better than when they dub over it with English.

So if it comes to an artsy movie theater near you check it out.

Adventures in Awkwardness

2006-02-24T15:07:00.000-05:00

Well good new everyone-my car is working fine (despite the engine manifold leak that has yet to be fixed) and after only two more freezing showers the hot water in our apartment was finally fixed (and it was really only bad until the second to the last since my rage kept me warm for the last one).

However, I realized that I forgot to relay one last story from my car trouble week: the story about hitching a ride with one of my kind co-workers/new friend. In retrospect I feel really bad for the guy because I was the most awkward, boring lump for the hour ride to work and the hour ride back. He was really very nice to put up with my monosyllabic answers to questions and awkward mumblings that I tried to chip in to the comversation.

It's times like these that make me really question my social skills-why do I air on the side of slug whenever I feel a tad nervous?! I honestly wish I was the type of person who rambles crazy fun stories when they are nervous because at least they're interesting, dynamic, and funny. I on the other hand get very quiet and avoid eye contact. And of course, I always think of funny things to say 5 minutes after the moment has passed and use up half my brain power that should be put towards social functioning and instead use it to mentally kick myself for not having a quicker wit.

Like when said co-worker was telling me interesting information about DC real estate and how my husband and I should look into buying rather than renting a funny thing to say might have been "Oh, I don't expect our marriage to last that long...". Sort of funny...right? At least better than "hmmmmm...yeah...........". Or when he inquired about the car troubled couldn't I have gone into one of my favorite childhood stories about the time that I skipped school to drive to the mall to buy a homecomming dress and ended up having to hitchhike my way home in a blizzard because my truck broke down. That's a pretty good story. Or when, while passing a lawn in rural Maryland that was filled with plastic lawn crap, we laughed about how you can tell a person from the lawn decorations, I should have said, "Yeah, I can't wait until I can have one of those Marys in a bathtub and so many cats littering the yard that walking up to my porch will be reminicent of the last scene of The Birds."
Wait....know that I read these things in print, they're really not that funny. Maybe it's actually a good thing that I kept my mouth shut. Ugh. I'm so bad at this!! I need social and/or electroshock therapy. Hey, I bet that would make a good story.

From Bad to Worse

2006-02-24T14:55:00.000-05:00

Beware, this is a post of just complete bitching...

It's been a rouch couple of weeks in Lynnville. Especially with anything mechanical.
First, on the way home from work last week the check engine light came on...so I take it into the shop and luckily it's just a computer problem that, even though still expensive, is easily fixed. However, while they're fixing that problem they find a crack in the lower intake manifold (wow, I kind of sound like I know what I'm talking about even though I don't) and it's going to cost about $1300 to fix. That's about half of what the car is actually worth.

Luckily, I talk to my dad and he says he can fix it no problem and just bring it back to Michigan when I get the chance. Problem solved, right? Or so I thought. On Tuesday I go grocery shopping (and of course stock up on frozen foods and a large chicken) and the stupid car won't start. So I'm stuck in the Giant parking lot with a trunk full of food. So I hoof it to the shop, again, and find out they have to tow the friggin car. The guy was nice enough to drive my to my car to get some of my groceris so I could metro them home...I remembered the frozen stuff but accidently left the chicken.

So here, I'm thinking, fine, I'll just have to pay the whopping amount to fix the manifold but atleast it will be done and I'll save both my dad and me the trouble having him fix it in Michigan...wrongo! It's something totally different, that costs an additional $500 plus towing costs plus the cost of the stupid chicken I left to stink up my trunk.

So now, I still have to take the car home to fix the manifold problem and pray that it doesn't break down on the 12 hour trip.

And to make matters even worse, we haven't had hot water in our apartment for two days. yup-cold showers for two friggin days. Today was esepcially bad. I went for a nice run to get myself all hot and sweaty so the shock of the cold water would actually be refreshing rather than murderous but it backfired. It was actually cold and windy today for my run so instead of the cold shower being a blessing it was horrible. Plus, the longer the water ran the colder it got-it was so bad that my finger nails were actually turning blue and it made me feel physically ill. Especially when the water hit my back. For some reason it was okay for all the other body parts but when my frozen hair hit the small of my back I swear I almost passed out.

Whew...that's it, enough bitching. Thanks for listning.

Brokeback Mountain +++++

2006-02-24T14:51:00.000-05:00

I finally saw Brokeback Mountain and I have to say I enjoyed it. It was really sad though, which is usually not my kind of movie.

Now I really don't know what to vote for in my usual Oscar competition with my sister and her husband. Normally there's one movie that I totally love over all the rest but not this year. And now I cna't even fall back on voting for the cutest. Do I vote for the eye cnady of Heath Leger and Jake Gyllenhall? Or my new celebrity crush Eric Bana?

Yet Another Addiciton...

2006-02-24T14:43:00.000-05:00

Oh which I forgot to mention in the last post-I've recently become addicted to the TLC show Miami Ink. And it reminds of the fact that I really want a tatoo but I'm such a wimp that I don't think I could ever go through with it. It's not that I'm worried about the pain, but more the fact that I'd probebly get sick of the thing but I'd be stuck with it the rest of my life.

Plus, getting a tatoo seems like a complicated process...first what to get? I don't think I'm bad ass enough to get anything with barb wire or a naked chic, which seems to be the typical choice. And I'm not girly enough to go with butterflies, flowers, or a chinese symbol for inner peace. Hmmmm...I could choose something that is associated with my hobbies or career but for some reason I think a portrait of Harry Potter or the Mona Lisa could get really old really quick.

And most importantly, where to get it? The lower back area seems to be popular but I'm not really pleased with the way my upper butt looks plus I don't wear low rise anything (and the world breaths a sigh of relief) so I wouldn't be able to show it off. There's the ankle, but that seems so early 90s. And the butt and boob are totally off limits-too tender. And the shoulder blade seems a bit manish...

Alas, I guess a tatoo is not in my future. How sad, because the thought of a huge dragon circling a heart with the name of my cat in the middle tattoed across my ass seems fun in theory.

New Addictions

2006-02-07T18:18:00.000-05:00

I know you all really care about what I do on a daily basis (your sarcasm meter should be off the charts right now) so here's a list of some of my new addictions. Maybe you'll get addicted too and then we can start a support group...

1. The Travel Chanel's Most Haunted. It's hilarious. I usually catch in on Sunday mornings when there's nothing else on and laugh and laugh. They have this crazy psychic guy that's totally full of shit but is so entertaining to watch. And then the host and one of the minions (I think Stuart is his name) are such lose canons that you just pray they make them go sit in one of the dark "haunted" rooms by themselves because within 10 minutes they've already wet themselves and/or started to tear up. It's awesome, really.

2. The No-Contact Jacket. I totally want one. Not only would it be great for running (so I could actually go at night) but also for practical jokes. Just imagine the hilarity that would insue if you wore this on a crowded metro sometime. Ah...the temptation to missuse this little gem would be unbareable. I'd better stay away.

3. TLC's What Not to Wear. Becuase I always knew I needed fashion help and this show confirms it. It pisses me off that the people on there are always so cranky and don't appreciate the fact that they look bad and now they get $5000 bucks to spend in NYC. Cripes, I wish I had that kind of bad luck. You people who call yourselves my friends...why haven't you signed me up for this show yet!?

4. Aveda's Madder Root Shampoo. As mentioned before it heightens the red tones in my hair and I love it. Except sometimes it gets a little streaky because I have a problem applying color to my hair evenly. I tried to color my hair once, it was a disaster. This allows me to do it slightly, and safely.

5. Tootsie Pops. An old favorite that I always forget how much I love. Except the chocolate ones (even though they're growing on me) and the new flavor they've introduced. It's in a green wrapper and I can't tell if it's supposed to be green apple or watermelon. Either way it sucks...what is Tootsie trying to pull here? While chocolate is wonderful it doesn't go with everything...such as green apple, watermelon, and hmmmmm...steak. Had to learn those the hard way.

Red Hair-not so interesting after all...

2006-02-07T18:07:00.000-05:00

For some reason I've always had a weird preoccupation with my red hair-it always made me feel somewhat unique since there aren't a lot of them out there. So when I saw a book at Barnes and Noble entitled Roots of Desire: The Myth, Meaning, and Sexual Power of Red Hair I had to have it. I've recently finished reading it and it kind of sucked. I thought it was going to be at least slightly scientfic and examine some of the gene basics that surround red hair and the characteristics that come with it but it mostly just discussed the the regular crap about red heads...that we're ubersexual, we have bad tempers, we're bad luck, we turn into vampires after death...you know, the usual.

The only new thing I did learn was about a line of shampoo/conditioner sold by Aveda called Madder Root that hightens the red in your hair. So I, of course, bought some and it's pretty cool.

Now, I've moved on to a much better book: The Historian. It's about, what else, vampires, seemingly another one of my obsessions. Must be the red hair. I'm weirder than I thought....

Munich +++++

2006-02-07T17:59:00.000-05:00

Good news...I fianlly got to go see Munich and it was excellent. So excellent that I decided to use Stacy's movie rating system and gave it 5 plus signs.

Though it was very good I have to confess that I had a twinge of guilt the entire time I was watching it because I was thinking dirty thoughts about Eric Bana-boy was he hot!!! So there I was, watching this compelling, serious movie about a tragic time in recent history and the part that moved me the most was when they showed Mr. Bana without his shirt. I'm going straight to hell...

And then it remineded me about a time in grad school that one of my classmates was talking about a trip to Munich and I, genius that I am, blurt out "Oooo...I've always wanted to go to Switzerland!" She just stared at me for a moment and turned away in disgust...since Munich is in Germany...

But really, see this movie 'cause it was great and now when you do, it'll remind you of what an idiot your blogger friend, Lynne, is.

Good Weekend

2006-01-29T10:54:00.000-05:00

Well, my fist week of school went great so I decided to celebrate this weekend-I went to see Underworld:Evolution and The Chronicles of Narnia.

Underworld: Evolution met my low expectations so I thought it was okay. It was a good guilty pleasure (you all know my love of any Vampire movie). But I have to admit I totally envied Kate Beckensale through the whole thing. No matter how much I keep this running crap up I will never, ever, look like that in leather, plastic, or any hybrid of the two, which was kind of depressing.

The Chronicles of Narnia, however, kind of disappointed me. Maybe I'm just getting past the point that I can watch movies that beat you over the head with messages, symbolism, and plot progression. Obviously I prefer crap with huge plot holes that make it confusing, at best.

I'm hoping to go see Munich tonight. Maybe that will leave a better taste than the others.

First Day of School--Again

2006-01-25T06:53:00.000-05:00

Well, it's the first day of the second semester which means:

1. I have to start getting up at 6 am to get ready. Yuck. I already feel ill.

2. I have to start planning slow cooker meals on Monday and Wednesday morning so I don't end up eating fast food and candy when I get home at 8 pm.

3. I'll have to tell a kid to shut his/her trap at least four times a week. Despite the lecture on class room behavior I'll give today...and this is college!!

4. That my car will become even more of a pig sty as I chuck empty fast food and candy wrappers into the back seat. In two weeks I won't be able to see out my window...

5. That I'll be able to call my blogger friends on my long drive home. (This means you, HotBabe. Sorry it's taken me so long to get back with you!)

6. ...And I'll love every minute of it.

Wish me luck!!!

LOST

2006-01-12T12:34:00.000-05:00

No, not the show...my day last Friday.

Zak's cousin's car broke down in PA on her way to MI about a month ago. So I got stuck with the job of driving her back up to the PA turnpike to turn in her rental car. That's one of the down sides of having a job with a nice long winter break-the influx of favors during that time.

Anywho, the drive up was nice. I got to break in my new iPod so I wasn't complaining...yet. However, miss cousin had failed to print off directions or any type of map to the Enterprise Rent-A-Car place so we ended up driving around Breezewood, PA for about an hour and half and being attacked by geese before actually finding the place and returning the car.

Then, fed up by this time, I called Zak to give us directions back to DC. "Take 99 N to hit 70S" he says? "North?!" I question. "Yes", he assures me. Well after driving about 45 minutes North all the way to Altoona, PA I finally realize that I really should have taken South in the first place and had to double back. Thus, a 5 hour round trip turned into a 9 hour round trip.

Ugh. I need a GPS system stat.

Remus? Is that you?

2006-01-12T12:28:00.000-05:00

Okay, so if you're not a Harry Potter fan you probebly don't get the title of this post but oh well...

I'm pretty sure my neighbor is a werewolf and it's starting to really freak me out. I haven't timed up of the astrological phenominon yet but every month the guy freaks out in his apartment. We can hear him through out the night and early morning yelling and screaming. Really. It's quite frightening. He yells, what seem to be, strange obscenities and every so often there's some banging around. Again, it usually only happens one night a month. However, this last time it continued well into the morning...so maybe he's just crazy? I don't know but the humor of it has started to wear off. Is he getting drunk once a month? Is it demons? Maybe he sees dead people-that seems to be in vogue right now.

Hair Update

2006-01-12T12:23:00.000-05:00

Oh Happy Day!

I got my haircut on Tuesday and I actually like it!! This is the first time in about 5 years that this phenomenon has happened. The woman who cut my hair was very nice-not to chatty-and actually listened to what I wanted! She only took off the two inches I asked for and then gave me some nice long layers in the back and front. It's just a nice updated version of my usual blanket of hair.

So, here's to you Karina at Bubbles Salon. You're my hero for the week.

ps-I STILL need to get a digital camera so I can post pictures faster. Be ready for a photo montage when I finally get my pictures developed.

An S.O.S. from my hair

2005-12-31T10:16:00.000-05:00

I despretly need a haircut and a new hairstyle. Anyone have any suggestions or good websites to check out?

I don't want a repeat of last year...

What I Did on My Holiday Break...

2005-12-30T19:00:00.000-05:00

Dec. 21: WORK HOLIDAY PARTY. Kind of lame. Made a cheesecake which no one ate. I just uncomfortably sat around a too-small room since I didn't really know anyone. Luckily the head of the Art History program and the head of the department recognized me so they chatted with me a while so it wasn't a total bust. Plus I received my first X-mas present from a collegue: a book entitled "Watch Your F*cking Language: How to swear effectively...". It came in handy for the rest of the holidays what with family around...

Dec. 22-23: CLEANING. Really, how does a one bedroom apartment get trashed so easily and take two days to clean?! I don't know either but it does.

Dec. 23: FIRST GUESTS ARRIVE. My sister and her husband were driving from Toledo after staying the day with my brother and his family. At around 8:30 pm there was a knock at the door...of course I thought it was them so I start jumping up and down and yelling and throw open the door-it was a surprised and extremely confused looking UPS guy. Apologized and tried to explain...more weird looks. Received 2nd X-mas gifts. Pictionary and Scattegories from Zak's sister.

Sister and brother-in-law finally arrive at around 10 pm. We chat and go to bed.

Dec. 24: CHRISTMAS EVE. Get up and actually go running! Don't worry it only happened once this break thus far...Hang out and eat lunch and chat with our visitors. Most of my time is spent protecting my sister from the cat who attacked her at every chance.

Played Yatzee (lost), Scrabble (won), and Monopoly (came in second) then ordered Chinese and made our famous Holiday punch. Well, famous to us since it contains an entire bottle of gin plus other spirits and causes at least one of us, if not all, to pass out at the end of the night. Continue to play games, Pictionary (won) and poker (lost). With the addition of alcohol, knowledge from first x-mas present is used in abundance.

Dec. 25: CHRISTMAS. Get up way to early and open gifts. Got alot of great stuff. Spend the rest of the day eating, drinking, and playing with gifts. Oh and naps. Many, Many naps. Cat plays in tissue paper for a while and then uses it as a baracade to swipe at people as they walk by.

Later that evening watch Lord of the Rings I and II.

Parents arrive LATE that night. More gifts, more alcohol, and more poker (won). Cat attacks dad and he almost loses a finger.

Dec. 26: BOXING DAY. Sleep in and make lunch. Proceede to watch Lord of the Rings III. Then go do a little after x-mas shopping. Pick up cute wrapping paper, ribbons, and holiday cards for next year. More x-mas punch and Poker that night (lost big time-I blame the punch...oh, and the chocolate).

Dec. 27: DAY I'M OFFICIALLY EXHAUSTED. Get up early and hang out catching up with the family. Then pass out due to lack of sleep. Later that night try to go to see Harry Potter on the IMAX with mom and sis-it's SOLD OUT!! I'm devistated.

Return home to order pizza and watch "March of the Penguins." I'm so sorry...but I hated it! Even around the holidays I'm a heartless wretch. Everyone falls asleep in the living room until my brother in law accidently drops an entire large box of clay poker chips. Cat, who was sitting on me, uses the right side of my body (and face) as a launching pad. Fear I will be scared for life.

Dec. 28: MARCH OF THE VISITORS. Get up early to help my family pack up their vehicles to get started on their trek home. Go to breakfast-place is packed with screaming kids and adults. Everone finally leaves after breakfast and Zak and I are free!! Go to Borders to purchase Harry Potter day planner. Return home and sleep. Cat does happy dance.

Dec. 29: GERMS. Wake up feeling sick. Family must have brought germs from young nephews in Ohio since they seem to be carriers of every flu/cold bug known to man. Sleep the entire day. So does the cat, who seems to be enjoying having her apartment back. So much that she takes naps every possible place to redistribute her scent...under the tree, every chair, every part of the couch, in the bathroom, on the bed, under the bed, and on the kitchen table.

Dec. 30: GERMS II. Still sick. Continue search for Harry Potter IMAX tickets-all sold out. Sleep the rest of the day.

So that's pretty much it. I'm hoping I'll be feeling better tomorrow so I can have a nice new years eve but who knows. Maybe the cold meds and the alcohol will make it that much more fun. Keep an eye out in the papers...especially for ones like "Drunk Woman, stressed from family, holidays, and germs, tries to scale Washington Monument. Knocks over National X-mas tree in process."

Two for Two

2005-12-19T18:44:00.000-05:00

It's okay...you can laugh

Usually I can get through the winter without falling once but for some reason, this year, it's snowed twice and I've fallen both times. It's two for two. I'm thinking of getting my inner ear checked...

This fall was so funny/bad/complicated that I felt it necessary to include an illistration. You can see by my skills (or lack there of) why I stick to art history and leave studio art for the talented.

So, here's the story...Last Thursday I was leaving for work and found, when I stepped out the front door, that the light snow that had fallen that morning was now mixing with the rain and creating a dangerous concoction. Thus, with bag, keys, and umbrella in hand I timidly stepped onto the first step of my slushy front stairs. I even grabbed onto the hand railing (which ended up being part of my down fall).

I immediatly slipped-but instead of my feet slipping OUTWARD (like normal) so I would fall on my ass, they slipped INWARD so that I feel down the flight of steps on my knees while my shins, ankels, and feet followed behind me....like some S/M version of a sled. So, as I was seated completly on my knees I could actually feel my leg muscles stretch much more than they ever should.

In addition (as if this weren't bad enough) I'd forgotten to let go of the railing as I slid down so my upper body and back was stretched in the opposite direction. The fall either looked really cool (like some impressive Madonna dance move) or really bad. It was either one or the other. Luckily I was able to get up (barely) and hobble my way to the car. I've already made it past the horrid back spasms and am only left with nasty brusises on both knees and ankles.

So enjoy-really I blog because I hope that people will get enjoyment out of my stupidity and pain.

Zombiesque

2005-12-14T06:58:00.000-05:00

I don't know why I do things...I went to the midnight showing of King Kong last night with Zak and some friends from work. We got home at about 3:30 am, were in bed by around 4 and had to get up at 6 am to get ready for work.

Good thing it was worth it. Not that the movie was SUPER great (even though the effects were amazing) but the company was excellent.

Even so, today I join the ranks of the walking dead. I'm pretty sure coffee. nor anything else, is going to pull me out of this.

Plus,it's Zak and my 3 year anniversary. We're going to have to take naps before our dinner tonight...

Happy (Belated) Birthday!

2005-12-14T06:55:00.000-05:00

Ooopsy! I forgot to post this on the 12th but HAPPY BIRTHDAY AB!!!!

I'm such a horrible person....but welcome to the world of having Chezlynne as a friend-you always get your birthday card late. So really, it's a weird compliment.

Lesson Learned...

2005-12-09T14:01:00.000-05:00

I am obviously enjoying running too much and someone (the fates, god, fortune, Santa…) is trying to teach me that snow fall and running DO NOT mix.

I’ve become too addicted they’re trying to say. To addicted to the 30-45 min/day when all my thoughts melt away (the million papers I have to grade, the fact that after reading only 1/3 of those papers I will already want to shoot myself in the face due to the bad grammar and half jumbled thoughts, the job offer I just got that I’m probably going to turn down even thought it’s more money that we really need, the fact that I didn’t get any sleep last night). All those thoughts gone and instead I can just focus on the fact that I can’t breathe and my muscles hurt.

Ahhhh…but it was so nice today. We’d just had another nice snow fall and everything was still covered so of course I was ready to be out in it. Yet again, I reassure you, running and snow don’t mix….

About a mile and a half into my run disaster struck. I hit an invisible patch of ice and was down for the count. It was a big fall too. I think I caught air and I’d be really surprised if there’s not a crack there come summer. Thus the rest of the “run” turned into a walk/hobble as I tried my best to keep my balance on the slippery walk ways.

After another half a mile I gave up and decided to walk in the road since it was clear of any ice or snow. So, I step on an innocent looking, fluffy patch of snow to make my way over to the pavement and….it was covering an ankle deep puddle! So for the last quarter mile I had to hobble with freezing sopping wet feet and pant leg bottoms.

But now I’m home. Warm and toasty and I’m thinking instead of using running as a relaxation technique maybe vegging out on the couch would work better for me. There the only risk of injury I have is falling from the couch in a daytime television induced haze and the only risk of getting wet is when I dribble ice cream down my front.

Snow!!

2005-12-06T14:33:00.000-05:00

Ahhhh...finally. It finally snowed here and it is so pretty! Nothing else puts me in the right mood for the holidays like snow. Last night I curled up to read and watched one of my favorite holiday movies and today I wrote out Holiday cards and wrapped presents. See! Instant holiday spirit. Now I think I'll try to go running in it-and hope not to break my ass-the only downfall I supoose of the winter wonderland.

However, in my old, jaded, crotchity age I've found that snow is really one of the only things I enjoy about this time of year. So enough being in a good mood...here's a list of things I hate about this time of year-Much more fun.

1. Those stupid Coca-Cola commercials with the polar bears listening to the Beach Boys. Polar bears are mean, people! They would eat the Beach Boys given half a chance. Why, oh why would the Coke company decide they are the best to market winter cola?! Yeah, that's just what I want, for Polar bears to add insult to injury after they attack and kill me, and drink my last soda.

2. Radio stations that play Christmas music ALL DAY. It's just wrong. Sure, I enjoy a good rendition of O'Holy Night and Baby,it's Cold Outside but do I need to hear all the other crap the whole day? Absolutly not. Mix my Christmas music with the Sex Pistols and The White Stipes...Please.

3. The Mall. There's no way I'm setting foot in any mall again until February. Why not just jump into the polar bear exhibit at the zoo? At least they'd have something to drink.

4. Winter traffic. Maybe it's just the DC metro area but people cannot drive here when it snows. Even if it's a light smattering of snow that is more like rain. Traffic slows to a crawl and people turn into idiots behind the wheel. Don't make me run you off the road people...at least speed up to 45. I promise you won't spin out of control when your SUV hits a puddle.

5. Figuring out what to say in your Christmas Cards. I acutally enjoy sending and recieving holiday cards but it's brutal figuring out the one run-on sentance that is going to sum up the last year of your life AND spread good cheer to your friends and family. Am I allowed to just initial at the bottom or is that rude?

6. Cookie Exchanges. Oh! What's that dear? You need 3-5 dozen cookies(!)to participate in your office's cookie exchange. Here's a friggin' box of oreos. Go wild.

7. Wearing big ass winter coats. That's right, I don't have enough trouble showing a good side of my figure without added 10 pounds of down and/or wool.

8. Hats. Often they're a necessity to ensure you don't freeze to the death but I don't not look good in hats AND whenever I wear one it makes my bangs all sweaty and stick to my forehead. Thus I look gross during and after the stupid winter hat is on my head.

9. The horrid puppet/claymation Christmas movies I used to enjoy as a child. If I have to watch Rudolf the Red-Nosed Raindeer one more time I'm going to freak out. Plus, for some reason Yukon Cornelius and Clarice really creep me out now.

10. The extra 10 pounds I am bound to put on this year due to cookies, candies, and booze that I will consume even with my attempts to be healty and exercise. Need I say more? I think not.

Lynne and Stacy like lists...

2005-12-04T15:44:00.000-05:00

TEN random things you might not know about me

1. I think the burrito is nature's perfect food.

2. I prefer not to wear socks.

3. (related to above) I have to sleep with my feet uncovered.

4. I've always wanted natural brown hair and brown eyes.

5. I have an unforgivable mean streak.

6. I baby-talk to my cat. But I'm not proud of it.

7. I get motion sick at the drop of a hat. Seriously, I could watch someone drop a hat and it would make me nauseous.

8. My favorite color is yellow

9. I hate licorice.

10. I'm not a big fan of chocolate.

NINE places I've visited

1.Blogger capitol of the world; Minneapolis, MN

2. The Sistine Chapel

3. The Eiffel Tower

4. The Call of the Wild Museum in Gaylord, MI

5. The London Eye

6. The Leaning Tower of Pisa

7. OzFest (1998 in Detroit, MI)

8. Hershey, PA

9. Yankee Stadium

EIGHT ways to win my heart

1. Tell me I'm funny.

2. Tell me I'm cute.

3. Tell me I've bewitched you body and soul (sorry, just saw Pride & Prejudice)

4. Tell me I'm smart.

5. Share my passionate hatred of morning alarms, seafood, and the low rise pant phenomenon.

6. Share my love of spaghetti westerns, scary movies, X-files, and/or Harry Potter.

7. Find my stories absolutly fascinating.

8. Think that staying in one's pajamas for an entire day is endearing not lame, pathetic, or gross.

SEVEN things I want to do before I die.

1. Travel to Egypt

2. Write a book

3. Finish my masters and perhaps a Ph.D.

4. Run a marathon

5. Travel to Machu Pichu

6. wrestle an alligator

7. Go to the oscars

Six things I'm afraid of:

1. Being in a plane crash only to survive and become stranded in the middle of the ocean and after days adrift to be swallowed by a whale or eaten by a shark.

2. Ghosts

3. Getting another bad haircut that will take me a year to grow out.

4. People who only listen to music without words.

5. Never reaching my full potential

6. marionettes

FIVE things I don't like

1. Rude people

2. any kind of seafood

3. doing dishes

4. earmuffs

5. man's inhumanity to man

Three things I do everyday
1. run

2. shower

3. check my e-mail

TWO things that make me happy
1. My fmaily and friends

2. my job

ONE thing on my mind right now
1. My botched blackberry beignets. I swear I used to be a good cook. I don't know what happened.

Lazy-Ass...the only way to do Thanksgiving

2005-11-28T06:42:00.000-05:00

Ahhhhhhh...I just had the laziest Thanksgiving weekend...and it was GREAT!

And I'm not talking normal lazy Thanksgiving where one falls asleep in front of the yearly football game after eating enormous amounts of turkey. I'm talking sleep in until 10 am and stay in your pajams until 4 pm kind of lazy. It was a nice recuperation period from the horrors that happened the weekend before (in-law post forthcomming).

Now, I know what you may be asking yourselves, "But Lynne, you are obviously well trained at the laziness. How can I plan a lazy-ass Thanksgiving for next year? Or, can I plan a lazy-ass Christmas?"
Here's how:

1.) Make no plans with family. Family will only cause the compulsion to not only clean but also cook something special or cook something from scratch. Plus, you'll actually have to get dressed at a reasonable hour instead of lounging in your underwear playing video games until noon. This puts a damper on a true lazy holiday.

2.) Leave work early the day before said holiday. Why not start the laziness early I always say...

3.) Don't cook ANYTHING! In fact, don't even plan to cook anything. This means allowing your refrigerator and copboards to dwindle down to a pitcher of water, a chunk of parmeson cheese, and box of stale Wheatables. This forces you to order take out until the grocery stores are open again and restocked.

4.) Make sure your favorite pajamas are clean and ready for all day use. The only exception to this is dressing to go out for a meal or if you decide to meet friends. In this case it would be beneficial that your pajamas actually resemble outdoor wear but not many of us are so lucky.

5.) Train your pet to being you sodas and various snacks. We're still working on this one for next year...

So, I slightly exaggerated what actually happened at my place this year...but only slightly.

WED: Zak and I left work early. Went to TCF and got cheesecakes. I got the pumpkin, he got the Godiva. Then we went home and sat on the couch and watched T.V. and played games.

THURS: Slept until 11 am!!! I know-epitome of laziness! Got up and actually went for a run, ate frozen turkey lunches and tried to make a batch of brownies. They, of course, burnt because for some reason I cannot make a good brownie. And since we had nothing else sweet to eat I did not just throw them out but merely cut off the burnt bottom and ate the gooey tops. Yum. Then we went out to dinner. I got the traditional roasted turkey plate and if totally sucked. I swear they gave me the neck. Instead, made several trips to the salad bar. Then we returned home, put on the pjs once again and watched old X-files episodes.

FRI: Slept in until 10 am!! Got up and stay in pajamas watching tv until about 3 when I finally took a shower and then we went shopping. Must have missed all the good sales but also missed the crowds which was excellent. Then returned home and...you guessed it...pjs and tv. This time watched "Two Mules for Sister Sarah"...have I ever mentioned my absolut love for old CLint Eastwood westerns?! Ooooo...another post to write...

SAT: Got up at 8 am! This time because we were meeting Christine and Isaac of New York Blogger fame. We had such a good time with them!!! They are the nicest people and we instantly had tons to talk about. I love that...no awkward silences or anything. We went to a local pub and ate, and talked about Harry Potter and Dr. Who and jobs and politics and tons of stuff. I hope they had a good time. Pictures to come...

SUN: By this time I'm already getting sad that its my last lazy day so I do it in style. Stayed in my pajams until 8pm!! It was great! Zak cooked chili and we just hung out and took naps and played games and watched movies. Ahhhhhh....

I hope everyone's Thanksgivings were as good as mine!!!

Quick Update..

2005-11-18T22:45:00.000-05:00

First, I am so sorry I've been so out of the blog world lately. I've had tons of stuff to post about I just haven't had the time....but that's no excuse! But still, in an attempt to try to expalin, here's a quick update to let you know what's been going on until I can be back officially.

1. WORK-The semester is comming to an end so of course this means that it's been super busy. Tons of papers and tests to grade, last minute changes to lectures, homework assignments to create, etc. However, I'll have a month off in Dec/Jan to blog-JUST BLOG!!! I plan on brewing pots upon pots of coffee and straping myself to the computer. Hey, I deserve it. After not posting anything for 2 weeks...I have to be taught a lesson.

2. BROKEN THINGS-All in the same week the following things decided to break: my car (luckily it has since been fixed), my bathroom sink (which has been broken for the past week even with multiple calls to the landlord. There's a gaping hole in the U-bend beneath the sink so that as soon as you run water it leaks to the floor.), my phone (which I have given up on and am just allowing it to be temperatmental until I can get to target to replace it), and techinically me since I STILL have the annoying hacking cough from the cold that started in MID-SEPTEMBER. I obviously have the immusne system of a weak new born kitten.

3. SHOPPING-I have been on a total spending spree lately. I bought an adorable pair of shoes as well as three very cute tops from Ann Taylor. All on sale I might add. However, as soon as I wore the shoes I got horrible blisters but was too stuborn to take them off so I still have the battle scars and as soon as I wore one of the new shirts I slopped food on it and I fear it is also scared forever, much like my feet. See, this is why I can't have nice things. Back to the orthopedic shoes and plastic shirts for me.

4. HARRY POTTER-I tried to reread the 4th book before the movie but I didn't make it. I won't go into details about the movie so I don't ruin it but I will say that I enjoyed it very much and the special effects were amazing!! But, don't take my word for it because it could have been two brits with sock puppets reenacting the story and I would think it was bloody brilliant!

5. THE IN-LAWS-They're vising this weekend and after a mere 24 hours there was already a shouting match about the hollidays...There are two more days to go so I think I'll save the rest of the details for a post dedicated all to them. That is, if I'm still alive on Sunday....

Harry Potter Kicks Ass!!

2005-10-30T16:45:00.000-05:00

You know it does!! Don't deny it.

I'm so excited about movie #4 comming out. And, of course, I already bought my ticket for the midnight showing!

Teachers Dressing Up-Yay or Nay

2005-10-30T16:38:00.001-05:00

I love Halloween! And you all know I love dressing up (see embarassing pictures of me for any Harry Potter event)! And yet, I still can't decide if I should dress up tomorrow at work.

It would be fun and I could some up with something great but, then again, it might be lame for me to dress up and look like an idiot in front of my students. So, I never know if I should go through with it or not.
I'll probebly just wear my orange sweater and striped socks. And of course I'll take in treats to share. Maybe I'll do my lecture in the mode of Danny Torence from The Shinning. That would be funny...for me, but I'm pretty sure my students wouldn't get the reference as they didn't get the Benny Hill or the Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade references I've made.

They've really made me acknowlege the fact that I really am a lot older than them. At the tender age of 26 I usually don't feel that way but they've made it pretty clear. So, I guess I've answered my own question...I probebly won't dress up since to them, I alreay look like the Crypt Keeper...

What is wrong with Boys?

2005-10-30T16:38:00.000-05:00

I'm pretty proud of the fact that I've been doing really good with my workout schedule. I've been running 2 miles, everyday, for the past 2 months. However, there is a major downside...and I can't decide if I should be offended or flattered.

The hoots and hollers started out slowly and I've been able to ignore them for the most part with down-cast eyes and blaring music into my head phones but the past couple days have been bad. One "gentleman" (and I use this term very loosely) yelled something in Spanish...it was really in depth and loud and I'm pretty sure it was a reference to my fat butt and tight pants. Then, two days ago, two landscapers almost broke there necks staring at me as I passed and then decided a hoot was needed. Then, to top it all off, today, as I had to stop to let some cars pass a cramped street I got a "Arrrrrrrr" (it's hard to type what it sounded like...it looks like he was making the pirate "argh" at me, which would havae actually made me laugh but it really sounded like a sick roll-tongue-R-sound that instead made me blush.)

Now, this behavior of course begs the question, will men hoot at anything in jogging pants and a sweatshirt? Really? I'm not a looker, especially when excersizing. I wear the oldest workout pants known to man (the purchase date can only be determined through radio-carbon dating), a ratty sweatshirt, gloves, and a hat over really bad hair. I've got plenty of junk in the trunk and I'm usually red faced, stinky, and out of breath at the beginning, middle, and end of my 2 miles. That's not attractive....ever. So really, what is wrong with boys? There must be something better to hoot at then the self-conscious chick staggering down the street. How about the shiney red truck that just passed me? Or the poodle that's about to rip my face off? Or hey, I have an idea, the Balley's close to my house has a huge window in front of the treadmills. Why don't you just drive up there and smash your faces to the glass.

Tis the Season

2005-10-25T17:39:00.000-05:00

Well, it's October and you know what that means folks...it means I have an abnormal craving for any type of candy or candy like substance. Normally I hate candy corn or bit-o-honey or those weird flavored tootsie rolls but not in October. Really, is it necessary that I have to go through this every year?

Today I decided to buy "healthy" sweet snacks in order to deter from a possible snicker binge and purchased granola bars and trail mix...four bars, half a trail mix bag, and 5 gobstoppers (which I found in the cupboard) later I now feel totally sick and unsatisfied. I should have just gorged myself of a couple of peanut butter cups and kit-kats and been done with it. Oooo...and candy corn. Should have sprung for the candy corn.

Telephone Hijinks

2005-10-16T15:59:00.000-05:00

While listening to the radio the other night I heard the funniest thing. A local radio personality received a phone call from a loyal listener who wanted to complain about some of the content on a recent show. Of course the radio personality was very polite and listened to the complaint but nicely explained to the man that he was not going to change any of the content on the show ever, merely due to his complaint.

Thus the listener wanted to talk to the radio guy's boss. The radio guy forwarded the listener to his boss's voicemail so that he could leave him a message. Except, every time the listener got close to finishing the message (in which he bad talked the radio personality)the radio guy would disguise his voice as a computer message and say "your message could not be rcorded properly. Please try again". The listener put up with this and restarted his voice message 6 times before he finally got wise and hung up.

This made me laugh so hard! Who would have the gall to do that?! I wish I did...and then I remebered a story about Zak that was very similar and reminded me what kind of people can actually do that and get away with it...

While we were living in Washington,DC in 20003 Zak was working on one of the presidential campaigns. One day a gentleman called Zak and was trying to give him tips on how to get this candidate elected (he used to have to put up with all kinds of crazy people). To prove his point the man refered to a certain TIME magazine article and went on to tell Zak all about it. About midway through the story Zak interrupts and says "Yeah I did read that article but did you read the one about The Incredible Hulk?" Of course the man got upset and hung up. He called back and demended to talk to Zak's supervisor. Zak transfered him to the secretary who then transfered him back to Zak! So, Zak answers and talks in a lower voice and gives the guy a fake name: Bruce Banner (the alter-ego name of The Incredible Hulk)! After the guy made his complaint "Bruce" assuered him that he would have a long talk with Zak and reprimand him.

I wonder if the guy ever figured out he'd been dupped? Either way, I have got to start trying crap like this. It's totally worth having the funny story.

Cheesecake Kicks Ass

2005-10-16T15:31:00.000-05:00

Guess what I got in the mail last week? Guess...you'll never guess. I got a pretty blue thank you card from "The Blogger Formaly Known as HotBabe" (Hotbabe, I've decided you should just start using a symbol like Prince). Included in said thank you note was a little piece of heaven...a gift card to The Cheesecake Factory!!! Wow...bloggers are so nice and I need them to visit more often.

So, of course, Zak and I went to The Cheesecake Factory (TCF) that night and gorged ourselves on entrees and, most importantly CHEESECAKE! Zak got the Dulce de Leche-his favorite flavor even though he can never quite figure out how to pronounce it and I (going against my tendency to get the original with strawberries) decided to get the Lemon Raspberry Cream. Oh my God-So good!!! The only bad thing about TCF is that their entree portions are so big that you go into food coma before you can even have a bite of cheesecake. Thus, we got ours to go and ate them for breakfast the next morning.
Zak's was very sweet and rich with delicious caramelly taste. Mine was light and fruity...thus I was feeling pretty good about myself until I checked the calorie damage on this site. My slice alone had 700 calories!! Poor Zak's was onver 1000. Too bad after the inital shock I still don't care. See, this is my problem...if eating a 700 calorie slice of cheesecake doesn't send me into a panic, what will?

Oh well...it was so worth it and it was the best thank you ever! Thanks so much Hotbabe!!!

Jaws, Shmaws...

2005-10-09T11:16:00.000-05:00

Rogue Dolphins? Is this a Joke?
Armed and dangerous - Flipper the firing dolphin let loose by Katrina Mark Townsend in Houston
Sunday September 25, 2005
The Observer

It may be the oddest tale to emerge from the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. Armed dolphins, trained by the US military to shoot terrorists and pinpoint spies underwater, may be missing in the Gulf of Mexico.
Read more...

Zak just told me about this story and I have to say, I'm still skeptical. Killer dolophins? Really, is that necessary? And if it is true is it bad that I laughed till I cried when I read this? For some reason I just imagine these poor dolphins in a dark isolated room being brainwashed into killers by men in suits. They probebly threatened the dissapearence of wives and girlfriends to get them to cooperate. Plus Zak swore he read that they had poison darts straped to their heads which added another dimension of hilarity.

Alas...what a boring weekend

2005-10-08T20:13:00.000-05:00

This has been a super boring weekend (especially compared to last weekend which was packed with movie night with Lady Di, dinner with cousins, and a trip to the Reanaissance Festival with Lady Di...pictures to be posted soon.)
Lets' see, what HAVE I done:

1. Well, the cold/allergies are finally subsiding. Coughing is at a minimum but when I do it's hard and loud.

2. Went to see Wallace and Gromit and the Curse of the Were-Rabbit. Nick Park is a comic genius. I know this is supposed to be for kids but it was hilarious. Plus I've been a Wallace and Gromit fan for ages so I have to see anything new.

3. It's been so rainy here. It's been kind of nice being able to open all the windows and listen to the rain.

4. I've been working hard on the thesis this weekend. Hopefully this will be the last draft for this one...I'm getting really tired of reading and typing about witchcraft.

That's about it. Hope everyone's weekend has been more exciting than mine!

When Allergens Attack

2005-10-02T18:25:00.000-05:00

So, what began as a fairly harmless bout with seasonal allergies has now turned into something dark and unnatural. Thus, I'm missarable and dreading tomorrow's lecture which will be low, raspy, and riddled with coughing and hacking. My poor, poor students.

They are about to discover a whole new side to their teacher and meet Sick Lynne. Sick Lynne is actually quite different from normal Lynne...here's a few examples:

1. Sick Lynne not only craves but demands sweet breakfast foods. I don't know why this happenes but I've been craving pancakes, muffins, and especially doughnuts. Luckily I've been able to contain the cravings this year and only wolfed down two glazed doughnuts instead of the entire krispy kreme dozen like last year.

2. Sick Lynne is feeble and as weak as a kitten. This includes stumbling, leaning on anything for a moments rest, and being barely able to lift myself out of the tub after tonights bath. I had to flop around several times like a wounded walrus before finally getting myself out.

3. Sick Lynne and running don't mix. Well, normal Lynne and running don't really mix either but atleast I was doing good lately (everyday for the past month and half). That is, until yesterday when I didn't have the energy to untangle myself from my blankets and gave up. Today I was only able to run the first half mile until, again, I gave up and walked/crawled the rest of the way.

4. Sick Lynne has no sense of humor. Normal Lynne would have found the irony in getting a fortune cookie that said "You will seelp well at night" when she was up all night coughing. Sick Lynne...well, not so much.

5. Sick Lynne actualy enjoys being cranky...in fact, she revels in it. Instead of trying to make herself feel better Sick Lynne will actually look for things to complain about...too bad my students have a quiz tomorrow. I have a feeling Sick Lynne is going to enjoy using her red pen more than usual;)

Happy Birthday HotBabe!!!

2005-09-25T09:03:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday, dear HotBabe,
Happy Birthday to you.

Cheers to you Friend!! Here's hoping you're already drunk and have been for the past few days on drinks purchased by hot young men. Here's hoping you gorged yourself on Triple Layer Fudge Cake and Pumpkin Spice Frappacinos. Here's hoping you got lots of presents and that there's more on the way. Here's hoping you didn't have to go to class this weekend. And here's to you, the best HotBabe out there!!

Happy 29th!!

Things I Discovered at 5:30 AM

2005-09-24T14:52:00.000-05:00

So you all know by now that I'm not a morning person. So why would I get up at 5:15 AM on a Friday to go running with Lady Di? Well, I don't know either but in a moment of weakness and obvious delerium I agreed to it.

But I'm actually glad I did because I've found that you can learn a lot of new things by leaving the apartment at 5:30 AM.

In a surprising moment of clarity I discoverd that:

1. Traffic is actually pretty busy around my place at 5:30 AM. I was really stunned at all the cars. I know I was dumb enough to get up that early but I guess a lot of other people are too. Very interesting.

2. Busses run that early in the morning. People were waiting patiently at the corner bus stop and a bus even stopped to pick them up. Who knew?

3. Coincidence is God's way of saying "Howdy". I can't take credit for this since it was on a church's billboard but at 5:30 AM it actually made sense. Now...not so much.

4. I should probebly just toss the sick science experiement that is likely to be taking place in the trunk of my car when I decided to throw a half eaten apple core into a day old fast-food cup of flat Diet Coke and then forget about it. I haven't had the courage to look in the cup but it stinks and I'm pretty sure it tried to bite me when I opened the trunk to get my long-sleeved running shirt out.

5. Early morning runners are either really nice or really crazy. Fellow jogging strangers would say "good morning" to me as they passed. Weird.

6. If I start running at 5:45 in the morning I can actually run just shy of 2 miles without stopping to walk or rest. Eventhough I couldn't keep up with Lady Di or her running partner I was still pretty proud of myself. I think I have the time to thank since that early my mind and body doesn't function at its fullest so I probebly couldn't quite feel by muscles buring or recognize the fact that I was about to die.

Even so, I'm still torn if I'll ever do it again. Do I really need to discover anything else?

Gross IV

2005-09-24T14:35:00.000-05:00

At least, I think I'm on #4 in my series of posts entitled "Gross"...

After all the times I've been grossed out by others I finally have to admit my own grossness to the world. I'm so ashamed.

After what must have been about two weeks of festering in a crockpot in my refrigerator I finally decided it was time to throw out a foiled beef experimentation. Really, is two weeks that long?

So what if it was slightly frozen and starting to seperate. And so what if when I was ungracefully trying to dump it into the trash that the garbage bag shifted and the whole thing splattered on the floor making me want to wretch.

Like you've never done the same thing! Stop judging me!

The Fog-best seen from the very beginning

2005-09-20T12:35:00.000-05:00

I recently went to the theater and while watching the previews took a small trip down memory lane.
Hollywood is making a remake of The Fog-did anyone see the original as a kid like me?
I remember it distinctly...my sister had a slumber party and, being the bratty little sister I was, I tagged along. During this time we had a laser disk player-did anyone else's family have a laser disk player? I remember my sister popping in the laser disk and shutting off the lights to watch a scary movie: The Fog. We watched and watched and watched and were so confused...what the hell was going on? After finished we'd decided the movie had no plot and was the dumbest thing we'd ever seen. Little did we know that night that we had put the laser disk in backwards and had watched the second half of the movie only.

Stupid laser disks. No wonder they never caught on. How do you make a movie product in which there is no way to tell if you are starting it from the beginnig or the middle. So I might actually have to go see this movie so I can finally see it in its entirety. I'm curious to see if it's actually good if you see it from the beginning. My initial guess would be no but then again, they are doing a remake...wait, scratch that. Hollywood also made a remake of Rollerball and Bedazzled...

It's Official

2005-09-20T12:30:00.000-05:00

I'm an official resident of Maryland...again.
Even though it's great to have my car registered and my new drivers liscence the joy is always dampened by the three hours spent at the DMV. Yuck.

And my picture look like total shit...of course. I've decided I'm just going to start purposefully looking like crap in my pictures that way it's purposefully funny instead of accidently sad and pathetic.
I look deranged and surprised in the newest ID picture. Of course this is because they take the friggin picture as soon as you stand up and turn around and don't give you even a second to adjust bangs or practice your smile.

Rat Bastards!!!

I really must be psychic

2005-09-12T17:39:00.000-05:00

So, of course, since I brought up the fact this weekend that I haven't changed my drivers license to Maryland yet or renewed my, now, long expired license plates that I would get pulled over this morning on my way to work.

Yup, that's right. So in addition to being clocked going 71 in a 55 I also had improper tags. Son of a Bitch! And I know this happened just because I opened my big mouth and made fate look my way. When the officer pulled me over I knew I was busted. In fact, I was totally in shock since I'd totally called it and was wondering if I was going to start to see dead people next. I didn't even lie or make any excuses..."I clocked you going 71 in a 55" "Ooops". "Did you realize you're registration is expried." "Ooops-I guess I did." By the time he came back to the car for the 3rd time I had even come to grips with the fact that I would rejoice if the ticket was under $500. I don't even want to think how much the ticket would have been had the officer actually given it to me. He must have taken pity on a new commer to MD (I told him I just moved to the area) or maybe I just looked more sweet and innocent than usual today.

Whew. By the seat of my pants, my friends. But I guess this means I'll have to spend my day off at the dreaded DMV. Luckily I have this ESP so I'll be able to sense when it won't be busy...oh yeah, never.

Makes Cujo Look Like a Plush Toy

2005-09-12T17:26:00.000-05:00

Bad Doggie!

So, if you been hanging out at ChezLynne for a while you probebly already know my bad luck when it comes to dogs and jogging. Or anything and jogging for that matter. Well, the dogs in Maryland have finally caught wind of my fear and the stories, thus, continue...

Recently I started major jogging again-after a fairly long hiatus since it's way to friggin' hot in DC. Finally the weather has started to cool and last week I ran about 10 miles (about 1-1 1/2 miles every day). I decided to lenghten my route to the dreaded 2 miles and that's when I ran into the two cujos.

I swear poodle and poodle like dogs are the most vicious out there. I was running, minding my own business when suddenly two dogs that look just like the one above-except with the addition of what I swear were blood soaked fangs-lunged at me through their fenced in yard. I have never heard such growling and barking and snarling. I just know they were about to jump the fence and then fight over who got to make the kill shot to my jugular.

Luckily they weren't there today when I went past (of course I made sure I was on the other side of the street this time). You'd think this would make me feel better but it actually worries me. They're just too busy right now planning an attack-one that will ensure that no one finds my body until next spring. In addition to being vicious, poodles are clever.

Any Shred of Authority or Dignity-Now Lost

2005-09-08T23:10:00.000-05:00

I'm pretty sure I've lost any kind of power I held over my students or any kind of dignity I ever felt I had after tonights class.

I'm pretty sure, when I used the bathroom during break, that I forgot to zip up afterwards. Yup. So that means it was an hour and a half of my unzpipped zipper being noticed, scoffed at, and talked about for, I'm sure, years to come. See, I told you the knickname would morf in due time. Now I'll be known as "that slow girl that teaches art history with her pants unzipped". Do you think people would believe me if I told them I do that because it helps me think?

And to add insult to injury, of course I was wearing the bright pink pasley undies. No, I couldn't just go with black that would have just blended in with my pants...nope...*pink* *paisley*!

Post HotBabe Visit Funk

2005-09-08T23:02:00.000-05:00

Don't you hate that? The feeling you get after something you were so excited about has come and gone and you're just left with the blahs. Darn you Hotbabe! Why couldn't you stay in DC?!

Well, you know what this means...someone else has got to come for a visit. Put on your travel pants and your driving gloves fellow bloggers 'cause I need some more visitors!!

Wish You Were Here

2005-09-03T12:14:00.000-05:00

The visit from HotBabe is going spledidly! I really hope she's having a good time.

That's what I worry about most when people come to visit-that they are totally bored. But Jen promises she's having a good time so I guess I should believe her.

Yesterday I picked her up and we went to The Cheesecake Factory. Yum. We also went to a Nationals game and gorged on beer, soda, and bad pizza and hotdogs. Luckily we had cheesecake waiting for us when we got back home so dinner was not a total flop.

Today we're going to Georgetown to shop. Yay! They hitting some bars and restaurants tonight including one from the famed X-files movie. I'm going to find the bar stool David Duchovny sat at and lick it. Shut up. It's not weird.

I'm sure there'll be more stories from tonight as well as embarassing pictures to post this week so you can all live vicariously. Wish all the bloggers were here with me and Jen to have a grand time together!!

Ignorence Was Bliss

2005-08-31T20:39:00.000-05:00

I really, really thought that I actually wanted to know just how many calories I was injesting when I went to Chipotle...but now that I do...I'm just depressed.

Check it out...if you dare.

Hello, My Name Is: Idiot

2005-08-31T20:29:00.000-05:00

This is the name tag I'm considering wearing around the college from now on. My second day of teaching and I'm pretty sure I've already been dubbed "that slow girl who teaches art history".

This is because I somehow left my car keys in the bathroom for about 3 hours. I used the bathroom as soon as I got to work, reminded myself not to forget them hanging on the back of the door, and walked out without them. I then proceeded to teach my 2 hour class and only realize they're missing as I'm about to leave.

Luckily someone turned them into the office but unluckily that I had to go retrieve them from the secretary, whom I'm pretty sure hates me. I got major evil eye as she reluctantly gave them back to me. I think she was hesitant since the key ring also had the sacred mailbox key on it too. I'm positive she was ready to revoke my mailbox privledges.

I wonder what else I will end up doing to get an even worse knickname...

I am so not a morning person

2005-08-31T20:20:00.000-05:00

It has begun. I'm already bitching about having to get up before 8 AM and I've only had to do it twice. But it's because I've officially decided (yes, officially) that I was meant to work the graveyard shift at some weird place that has graveyard shifts.
I don't understand why I'm more comfortable staying up all night and sleeping all day when the whole world is on the reverse schedule. Even so, I'm trying by best to switch to being a normal person but it's not quite working.

Case in point, this morning: First morning freak out was my super loud alarm. So loud that I'm pretty sure someone could mistake it for a jet engine. I have to set it at blare or I'll totally sleep through it. It has to be so loud that it actually jolts me out of bed, wide eyed, and scared. So much so that I actually yell, "Oh, God" and think frantically what that horrid sound could be. Yup, this actually happened this morning. And no matter how long I've had the same alarm, every time it jolts me out of bed it seems to shake the knowledge of how to shut the damn thing off in a timely fashion.

Next...after my pupils get back to normal and the pounding in the head subsides I shuffle off to the bathroom for a shower. Freak out number two when I discover a weird centipied type bug in the tub and have to catch and flush it in the toilet. Of course this makes me parinoid that one of his little friends is going to seek revenge and attack me while I take a shower. So when some of my hair gets wrapped around my finger I freak out again thinking it's the rouge centipied.
More heartpalpitations and an increasing head ache.

I need to start drinking coffee first thing...and I mean first thing. I'm thinking of setting myself on an IV drip during the night so my damn alarm isn't such a surprise.

Like a Theif in the Night

2005-08-29T18:14:00.000-05:00

I stole this from Kiddo, Christine, Stacy...and others I'm sure.

Seven things you plan to do before you die:
1. Finish my Masters
2. Get my Ph.D.
3. See the Pyramids of Gizah and Teotihuacan.
4. Write a book.
5. Meet David Duchovny
6. Buy a Jaguar
7. Learn to fix my own car.

Seven things you can't do:
1. Whistle
2. Do any kind of handstand or summersault
3. swim
4. spend a day with my husband without getting in some sort of fight or argument
5. eat fish/seafood
6. drive 55
7. wear new shoes without getting blisters

Seven things you can do:
1. play the trumpet
2. overhand serve a volleyball
3. sleep through anything (including hurricanes and alarms)
4. speak French
5. remember phone numbers like a computer
6. drive a tractor
7. pick things up with my toes

Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex
1. sense of humor
2. friendly smile
3. intelligence
4. good expressive eyebrows
5. tallness (is that a word?)
6. being passionate about things
7. kindness

Seven things you say most:
1. Rat Bastard!
2. Oh No...
3. Ya Know?
4. Wow.
5. That's Hilarious!
6. Bite my big fat ass
7. crazy...

seven celebrity crushes:
1. David Duchovny (what a surprise...)
2. Elijah Wood
3. Johnny Depp (when he's dirty and greasy)
4. Vince Vaughn
5. Alan Rickman
6. Colin Firth
7. Matt Damon

Seven people you want to take this quiz:
1. Diane
2. DC Donut
3. HotBabe (have you been tagged yet?)
4., 5., 6., 7. Anyone who hasn't been tagged yet.

Great Weekend-Great First Day of School

2005-08-29T18:01:00.000-05:00

Well, except for the fact that our internet was down all weekend I had a pretty good time.
I went shopping for new clothes and shoes to wear for my new teaching job. I got these great shoes (they look cuter in person and were a lot cheaper)as well as a cute skirt and two boring pairs of pants.

I also got a haircut-one that I actually liked. I think the lady was actually able to even out my last bad haircut.

And today, the first day of class, was a hit. Well, by hit I mean none of my students fell asleep during the lecture today and seemed to understand everything. Keep you fingers crossed that they'll keep up the good work.

And to top it all off...it's K-State Katie's Birthday!! Happy Birthday Katie!

Blogging Rut

2005-08-23T22:56:00.000-05:00

Ugh! I've been so off my blogging game lately!! It's just been so boring around here that I have nothing funny or even interesting to say. But rest assured, I'm sure the rut will stop once I start my new job and have lots of crazy and embarrassing stuff to talk about...which is usually what happens when I'm in public places. So until then, sorry I have a feeling I'll be a bit boring.

Sorry, You Won't be Getting Books for Christmas this Year

2005-08-18T15:59:00.000-05:00

I GOT THE JOB!!!

I'm so excited. I'm going to be teaching two art history courses this semester! Sorry, I guess this means my friends and family should stop making those book/cd/dvd lists because I'm not going to be getting that discount after all.

Here's my next dilema. Do I just totally blow off Barnes and Nobel and stop showing up? Or do I play it nice and give them a call? Ugh.

Wish me Luck!

2005-08-18T09:16:00.000-05:00

It never fails. Everytime I take a crappy job I immediatly get an interview for a job I want.
When I had just moved to Detroit I gave up hope and took a job in Visitor Services (blah) at the Detroit Institute of the Arts. At least I was techinically working at a museum. However, as soon as I took the job I got an interview and a job teaching art history at a community college.

It would seem the same might be happening here in DC. After putting out tons of resumes to community colleges, museums, and even administrative postions at universities I got no call backs and decided to give up home and take a job at Barnes & Noble. My orientation was yesterday and I've never felt so old or unfullfilled. But I decided I could put up with it since at least I'd get a kick ass discount, right? Well during the orinetation I got a call from one of the community colleges I applied to wanting me to come in for an interview!!!

So I had to blow off my B&N trainging for today in order to drive to the interview and get this job! Oh, I hope I get this job! So wish me luck that history might repeat itself and I'll be teaching art history instead of "learning" to file books in alphabetical order...(if they hired me, shouldn't I already know how to do that?!)

I was always bad at Tag

2005-08-12T14:01:00.000-05:00

I was tagged by HotBabe. I'm going to do my best to keep the game going...

"List ten songs that you are currently digging ... it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're no good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the ten songs in your blog. Then tag five other people to see what they're listening to."

1. Feel Good Inc. by Gorillaz: It always makes me want to shake my ass. Thus I listen to it while I work out.

2. Don't Let me be Misunterstood by Santa Esmeralde from the Kill Bill vol. 1 sndtrk.: This is a great escape song for me. I imagine myself in that red dress Jennifer Lopez wears in The Wedding Planner dancing at a fancy party. Alas...I don't have the red dress or a fancy party...oh, and I can't dance.

3. Sexx Laws by Beck. Because Beck is awesome is this song is so much fun.

4. Don't Funk with my Heart by The BlackEyed Peas. 'Cause I like it. I just do.

5. Sex Bomb by Tom Jones. Because it's hilarious and reminds me of my first trip to Paris...long story. Plus I've always wanted to go to a Tom Jones concert and through my undies at him.

6. Since U Been Gone by Kelly Clarkston. I don't know how I got hooked on this but it happened. But I hate the fact that they just use a "U" instead of You. I just realized this. I might knock this song off my mp3 just for that reason.

7. Somebody Told Me by The Killers. I might become a fan of The Killers since I like Mr. Brightside as well. But I still haven't officially decided. It's not one of those things I like to rush into.

8. Best of You by the Foo Fighters. Excellent song. I've heard the Foo Fighters are touring with Weezer-I really want tickets to that show.

9. Rock the Casbah by The Clash. I am always into this song. I love it.

10. Float On by Modest Mouse. I know it's old now but I still heart Moderst Mouse.

Okay, now I tag 5 people, right? Hey, Stacy, Colleen, Diane, DC Donut, and AB aka Anasazi, you're it!!!

We Have a Winner!

2005-08-12T09:20:00.000-05:00

The Birthday Showdown is officially over and the results are in: Zak won.
Here's why-

12:00 AM: Zak starts out early. Suggests that I wear a nightgown to bed rather than my treasured cat pajamas. Since it's technically his birthday and I'm still feeling nice at this moment I oblige. I wake up at 2 AM sweating with the nightgown wrapped aorund my neck. (1pt-Zak)

7:00 AM: Am awaken by the sound of the phone ringing. It is Zak's parents calling way to early again to wish Zak and Happy Birthday. (1pt-Zak)

7:15 AM: Am reawaken by the sounds of everything falling in our hall closet due to Zak looking for the iron and ironing board. Actually get up to help and am roped into doing the ironing for him. (2pts-Zak)

7:20 AM: Am cranky and mean and hurl insults like "wanker" and "rat bastard" even though it's his birthday. Also try to make iron burns on his shirt but it doesn't work. (1pt-Lynne, for effort)

7:30AM-6:00 PM: Zak has to go to work and I get the place to myself. Eventhough I do work as well I consider the fact that I get to watch tv and finish off the Cheetos a victory on my part. (2pts-Lynne)

6:00 PM: Pick Zak up at the metro for his birthday and allow him to decide where we'll go for dinner. He doesn't know yet and decides to "just drive" one of my most hated phrases. (10pts-Zak)

6:30 PM: Finally find a possible place. Walk up to door, see menu, see that no menu item are less than $30. Leave. Am humiliated. (1pt-Zak)

6:35 PM: Drive down to Bethesda, an area I despise going to eat because it's always packed. Drive around for a half an hour starving while we try to find a parking spot. I finally snarl about just leaving so we do. (pts are a wash)

8:00 PM: finally drive back to downtown Silver Spring, find a parking spot, and Zak finds a weird Lebaneese cafe to go to. Yay. Lebaneese. The food is okay but I do have the best Hummus I've ever had there. Even so...it's Lebaneese. (5pts-Zak)

8:45 PM: Don't even get Cold Stone Creamery or any other special sweet treat out of the deal since Zak wants to skip it. (20pts-Zak)

9:00 PM: Luckily I had bought ice cream for such emergency that day at the store. Am saved. (5pts-Lynne)

9:05 PM: Watch Zak's chosen video. Hide and Seek with Bobby DiNero and Dakota Fanning. It's scary. (1pt-Zak)

10:00 PM: Discover half way through that I had called the plot twist when we'd originally saw the theatrical trailers and ruined it for Zak. (3pts-Lynne)

11:00 PM: Watch Iron Chef after the movie. (again, pts a wash since we both enjoy the show).

12:00 PM: Go to Bed. (1 pt-Zak since I wasn't tired yet)

So, as you can see. Zak made me a lot more miserable than I made him. I'm going to have to get some good ideas from everyone so I'm a shoe in for the gold next year.

A Very Fine Birthday

2005-08-09T21:39:00.000-05:00

The Zak vs. Lynne birthday battle isn't quite done yet (the final showdown is tomorrow night) but here is how the points stand thus far:

8:45 AM: Lynne still sleeping...even the cat knows it's a special day and has foregone usually 6 AM meow session. (1 pt-Lynne)

9:00 AM: Phone call from the in-laws. Too early and they ask about non-existent job and unfinshed thesis papers. (1 pt-Zak)

9:45 AM: Intense workout. Run for 30 min. and tons of situps while blaring music. Neighbors do not complain. (1 pt-Lynne)

10:30 AM: Check mail. Three birthday cards, two of which contain money, and newest X-files DVD. (2 pts-Lynne)

10:30 AM: Two birthday cards for Zak, both of which contain money. (1.5 pts-Zak)

10:35 AM: Shower. (No points given for good hygine-it's a reward in itself)

11:00 AM: Phone call from Mom. She tells me to give Zak birthday wishes from her meaning she probebly won't call on his birthday. Proof she loves me more. (1 pt-Lynne) But she calls during Gilmore Girls (1 pt-Zak).

11:30 AM: Take self out to lunch. Sushi (1 pt- Lynne)

12:00 PM: Return home and blog. Find tons of birthday greetings from Blog friends (THANKS EVERYONE!) (10 pts-Lynne)

1:00 PM: Get positive e-mail from professor regarding thesis. (5 pts-Lynne)

1:15 PM: Watch movie. Return to Me with David Duchovny. (2 pts-Lynne)

3:00 PM: Blog and e-mail more.

4:00 PM: Phone call from Zak telling me he's actually comming home early. (1 pt-Lynne)

5:00 PM: Gilmore Girls and X-files reruns (1pt-Lynne)

6:00 PM: Zak gets home and finds out I've decided I want to go to Chipotle for dinner...again. Zak whines and says "again!" (1 pt-Lynne)

6:15 PM: Actually get Zak to spring for chips, salsa, and my own drink. (2 pts-Lynne)

6:30 PM: Eventhough I've already eaten my weight in burritos, chips, and soda, decide a Dairy Queen Double fudge cookie dough Blizzard could really hit the spot. Zak complains that he's too full and begs to wait till tomorrow to get it. I whine about needed a sweet treat on my birthday and get my way. (1 pt-Lynne)

7:00 PM: Complain the whole way home about my tummy ache from eating my weight in Blizzard. (1 pt-Lynne)

7:30 PM: Return home and watch 4 hours of X-files. (1 pt-Lynne)

9:23 PM: Zak's grandparents call during the X-files marathon to wish me a happy birthday. (pts are a wash for this one)

11:00 PM: Force Zak to play his most hated game, Scatagories, until we couldn't hear the timer over his whining and crying. Beat him soundly. (1 pt-Lynne)

11:55 PM: Force Zak to do as many meanial tasks in the last five minutes finishing every request with "for my birthday". (1 pt-Lynne)

What a let down. Now everything is back to normal for me. I had to do laundry today and cook dinner. I'm trying to prepare myself for the possible hell I might have to endure tomorrow. Details later...if I'm still alive!

It's My Party and I'll Make You Cry if I Want to

2005-08-04T14:06:00.000-05:00

My birthday is coming up! Actually Zak's birthday is coming up too. I'll be turning 26 on the 8th and he'll be turning 26 on the 10th.
It's quite nice having our birthdays so close together-each year it feels like a mini-holiday just for us. However, recently it seems we've developed a bad habit with our mini-holiday: trying to make the other miserable on our birthdays. Really, it's the only day of the year that we can pick exactly what we want to do and the other must accommadate with minimal complaint. So now it's become somewhat of a challenge. Just how many things can I force Zak to do, things he'll hate, on the 8th? And just how many things will he get me to do?

I still haven't decided what havoc I'll wreak quite yet but my brain is working over time. I know I want to go to dinner…but what restaurant will he hate most? Chipotle…since we go there all the time and he’s sick of it? Something expensive? The Medieval Times place that I’ve always wanted to go to?...that would kill two birds with one stone since it’s expensive and possibly embarrassing. And what to do for dessert? They have a new cookie dough blizzard at Dairy Queen but that seems a little low brow when I should be taking full advantage. Maybe Cold Stone Creamery? Or maybe I should request a home made cake…I should put him in contact with Stacy since she’s the queen of cake making.

And then we have activities…so many to choose from. Should I force him to watch old episodes of X-files and Gilmore Girls? It’s sure to get some whining. Or perhaps going to see March of the Penguins which I’ve been wanting to see ever since Christine posted about it. Oh! And definitely a couple of rounds of Scategories, his most hated game because I always win. Hmmmm... all sounds so good.

But there is also a dilemma to all this...since his birthday is last, pay backs could be hell. Am I willing to take the risk? Yeah, I think I am. Let the birthday games begin.

2005-07-30T11:39:00.000-05:00

Everybody Loves a Slide Show

2005-07-28T22:36:00.000-05:00

We Like Free Chocolate

Me and my sister are standing outside Chocolate World in Hershey, PA. It wasn't quite what we'd hoped but we still got free chocolate at the end of the tour. It was a free tour...and you could go as many times as you wanted...heh heh.
Don't worry, we made up for it at the gift shop and the bakery.

Hershey Cocoa

2005-07-28T22:35:00.001-05:00

Smells Like Chocolate

This is right next to the large Herchey factory smoke (?) stacks. It smelled like chocolate here too. Yum.

The Center of the Universe

2005-07-28T22:35:00.000-05:00

Where Oompa Loompas Live

Oompa Loompas probebly don't live *here*. They probebly live at the factory.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

2005-07-28T22:34:00.001-05:00

Harry Potter: Book 6

So here's another peak into the madness of Chez Lynne. Atleast my sister and I weren't the only ones to dress up this time...or should I say the only *adults* to dress up this time. (Not like for the 5th book) My sister is the tall one and I'm the one next to her kissing the book. My lame attempt to be clever.

But the party was fun and the book was excellent so I kind of don't care that I'm a total freak. Kind of...

Hershey, PA

2005-07-28T22:34:00.000-05:00

Hershey Factory

This is the actual Hershey factory and the place where it actually smelled like chocolate outside. So, needless to say, we spent quite a few minutes here with our noses in the air like beagles while townfolk drove past us giving us dirty looks. You'd think they'd be used to it by now. You'd also think they'd be in better moods with all the chocolate around.

A Trip to Meijer Gardens

2005-07-28T22:33:00.000-05:00

Big Horse

In addition to visiting the Petra exhibition in Grand Rapids, MI, my sister also took me to visit the Meijer Gardens which, as you can see, has a GINORMOUS statue of a horse that was based of a design created by Leonardo da Vinci.

I wanted to pose as a lump underneath the horses bum but my mom (who was taking the picture) thought it might be a little inappropriate. I still think it would have been funny...

Hell of a Night

2005-07-28T18:40:00.000-05:00

Literally.

We had horrible storms yesterday here in the DC area and of course the power went out. Which would usually be nice and romantic with the darkness and the candels and such if it had not been a million degrees outside.

The power went out at about 6:30 pm and didn't come back on until 2 am. It was so hot in our apartment I had to...well...sleep in the nude. So maybe this doesn't seem like a big deal to some of you but I hate not wearing pjs. It seems so wrong. So in addition to being in an uncomfortable heat I was also uncomfortable being naked. I'm a prude. I'm okay with it.

I'm Back!

2005-07-25T12:26:00.000-05:00

Whew! What a trip.
Here's an update of my past week without blogs:

1. Michigan is hot. Especially since my sister doesn't have air conditioning. Yuck.

2. Biking 9 miles will make anyone's butt sore... but especially my fat ass.

3. I finished Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince in 24 hours. If you haven't jumped on the Harry Potter bandwagon I suggest you do so. Even though they're written for kids the books are bloody brilliant.

4. Too much Harry Potter and BBC Bargain Hunters will cause anyone to speak in a bad fake british accent for a week... but especially my fat ass.

5. I need a digital camera so I can post pictures quicker. Until then you'll have to wait until I get my film developed.

6. I want to go to the real lost city of Petra. The exhibition was awesome.

7. Hershey was a bit of a disappointment. It was crowded with unattended kids and old people and it only smelled like chocolate on the corner of Chocolate and Cocoa Avenues. I will have to return when I can actually get the Chocolate bath and spa wrap. But Hershey chocolate does tase better when it's fresh.

8. I will never fly out of Dulles International again. United has this new rule that they will not check your bag onto a plane if you check in less than 45 minutes before your flight. This probebly would'nt be a problem if they had enough employees to check everyone in a timely manner. After waiting in line for 30 minutes I got in just under the wire. The poor lady next to me was no so lucky. Total bullshit if you ask me.
Then it took me about 20 minutes to get through the security screening and about 15 minutes to take a cramped shuttle to my gate. I just made it to my plane and that was with an extra hour and a half before take off.

9. I missed blogging. I'm going to try to catch up on my blog reading but I'm not making any promises.

We interupt this blog to bring you a...break from this blog

2005-07-13T20:04:00.000-05:00

I'm taking a trip to Michigan to visit my sister tomorrow so, sadly, that means I might not be able to Blog for about a week. I know, I know...but you'll just have to try and get along without me for a bit. I'll pine for you all, I promise.

It should be a fun week. We already have tons of stuff planned:

1. Harry Potter Book 6 Midnight Realease Party!
You know what this means, folks. There will be lots of insane pictures of me dressed like a Harry Potter character for your enjoyment and/or extortion plans.

2. A garage sale!
Yup. I'm finally selling my acid wash jeans and old Stephan King books. I'll let you know if I can retire early...

3. A trip to Calvin College to see a new exhibition based on the Lost City of Petra.
So I'm a Geek for being super excited for this but...shut up, it's cool.

4. All the fun that just naturally comes along with visitng my sister!

5. A trip to Hershey, PA!
Sorry Jen, I was going to wait for you but...well...they have chocolate baths and streets paved with sweet chocolately goodness so I know you'll understand my having to go without you.

I'm sure I'll have lots of stuff to blog about upon my return. I promise I'll make up for my absence with about 30 new sposts of fun and embarassing Michigan moments.

Stupid Fruit

2005-07-12T11:25:00.000-05:00

Why does fruit have calories? It just doesn't make sense.
I've been watching my calorie intake and trying to eat healthier and I hate the fact that fruit can actually have a lot of calories.
Nectarines are my new favorties but they have about 80 calories per peice. Same for apples, bananas, oranges...Stupid fruit.
Don't I just burn that off naturally anyways? Fruits and vegitables should be freebies. I should be able to eat as much of it as I want with no worries. I guess it's still better than eating unlimited amounts of cookies and candies but still.
I'm a little disgruntled about this.

Bwwaaa Haaaaaa Haaaaa (evil laugh)

2005-07-08T14:22:00.000-05:00

Another person has just become addicted to blogging like the rest of us...my very good friend, Diane. I have a feeling she'll end up blogging instead of doing work like me. I'm such an evil enabler!

But you should check her out!
She's so cool that she's one of the reason's I wasn't sad to move back to DC.

Raindrops Keep Fallin' On My...Rice, Flour, and Canned Goods

2005-07-08T11:42:00.000-05:00

It rained really hard last night so of course that means Zak and I were startled awake at 6AM this morning by the neighbors below informing us that water was dripping in their kitchen. This happens once or twice every year. And it's never as simple as perhpas me accidentally letting the bathtub or kitchen sink overflow...No. It has to be some major plumbing debacle or a huge leak in the roof.
And, even though it's not my fault (it's just our crapity ass apartment), I always feel so guitly whenever this happens because the neighbors are always so accusatory and just stand in the hallway staring at you even after you tell them it's not your fault-I'm going to start shooing them away with a broom.

This time, upon further investigation I found that I too had a huge leak in the bathroom ceiling and behind my cupoboards in the kitchen. And, of course, it had to be the cupboard that holds all our sundries. So the morning consisted of drying off boxes of rice, bags of flour, and the mysterious can of apricots that I don't even know who purchased.

This also means that I'm worried to take a shower (just in case that's part of the leak problem) and I'm all gross. For some reason I'm totally fine with hanging out in my pjs the whole day if it's of my own accord but when something else keeps me from taking a shower I can't stand it.

I might risk it anyways since people always seem to stop by when I lounge in my pjs all day, unshowered and unshaven. Like the time my landlord stopped by to bring me some lease paperwork. Is there anything more uncomfotable than standing in a tank top and bottoms with blue cats all over them in front of a 40 year old man you barely know? Ah yes, that actually is less embarassing than the time I lounged around all day and two young Morman gentlemen stopped by. I felt especially uncomfortable that time since I was wearing a too tight shirt and no bra. I think keeping my arms crossed in front of my boobs only drew more attention to the problem.

You would think I've learned my lesson...and yet...I obviously haven't. These cat pajamas are just so dang comfy!

Mmmmmm...surveys

2005-07-07T15:30:00.000-05:00

I got this from ab's blog who got it from Christine. Seemed like a good think to do. Plus, MIT told me to...I'll pretty much do anything that MIT says.

Uneventful Independence Day Weekend

2005-07-05T11:16:00.000-05:00

I didn't do much this weekend-but that was kind of nice.

Saturday: Lounged around the apartment.
Did some scrapebooking. (My cat now has an entire book devoted to her.)
Went to Olive Garden for a late lunch/early dinner.
Rented "Team America" and "After the Sunset".

Sunday: Lounged around the apartment.
Went to see "War of the Worlds". (It was okay. I'm reading the book now-I should have read it first. I didn't like the ending but oh well...it reminded me of that Simpsons Episode were they satire "The Lord of the Flies" and at the end the voice over comes on and says, "and they were all saved by...let's say...uh...Moe.")
Bought some stuff at Target.
Went out to dinner at our favorite Greek place.

Monday: Prepared a nice Carpet Picnic. (Complete with blanket to sit on and wild life-Sprout was relentless. It was yummy, though. We had lots of snacks I hadn't had in forever! Hotdogs, Potato Chips, Pop, Dip, Blueberry Muffins, and Fruit Salad.)
Lounged around the apartment and tried to decide if we were going to go downtown to see the fireworks. (We'd gone down to the Capitol for the 4th a couple years ago and, even though it was beautiful, it was a huge hassel.)
Read half of "War of the Worlds" and the entire "Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants". (I'm a fast fiction reader.)
Decided to stay in and play board games and watch "Die Hard" on televeision.

From the description one might think it was a pretty lame weekend but it was really the best.

Creepy, Huh

2005-06-27T21:11:00.000-05:00

creepy, huh

My sister sent this to me from the newspaper in our home town. Apparently the advertising for Vacation Bibile School has taken a little turn towards the weird and creepy.
Yikes! I don't know what it is about this drawing but it feaks the hell out of me.

It just seems so Texas Chainsaw Masacre with the ranch/farm theme. Plus I think the drawing is supposed to be of a puppet and I don't like puppets. Anyway, it just makes me nervous and I can't beleive some nice person at, what I'm sure is a very loving church, would think this is an okay way to entice parents to bring in their kids.

And another thing, it's Vacation Bibile School. I hated vacation bible school. Does any one else have as horrible memories of it as I do? What torture. It's finally summer and I don't have to be forced to go to regular school and my parents think I need BIBLE school.

The food always sucked-it was usually hot dogs and a bowl of communal chips that I always steared clear of after seeing all the dirty, fithy hands dip into it. And the craft projects! Dear Lord the craft projects. How many yarn crosses does one need?

And our church had this horribly unsafe play area that they would dump us out into the 100 degree sun when they were through dealing with us. Instead of grass, or even cement, they added large gravel rocks beneath the swings and teeter-totters. The swings and teeter-totters themselves were rust crusted so much that you could cut any bare part of your body. I wonder if they kept tenus shots on hand.

This clipping just brought back way too many bad memories.

Blockbuster better not screw me over

2005-06-27T20:58:00.000-05:00

So I've finally succumb to signing up for one of those rental by mail thingies. I decided on Blockbuster rather than Netflix since I'm supposed to get free in-store rental coupons from the BB deal. Even though it sounds like a good enough deal I'm still skeptical. It always seems like these things could screw me over at any time.

But in the meantime (before the eventual disappointment sets in) it seems like a lot of fun. I'm excited I have my own queue. I'm always so curious to know what's on other people's queue...it could be some really weird stuff and no one would ever know.

Here's what on mine:

The X-files: complete seasons #3-7 (I'm concerned about putting tv seasons on my list. Are they going to send them in order? Or is that how they get their fun?)

The Gilmore Girls: complete seasons #1-3 (I didn't think I was going to need season one since ABC Family was supposed to play a season one marathon this past Sunday...but they skipped around! Who does that?! I'm totally lost...well not totally but still. Lorilei was hit on by one of the dads from the private school that Rory attends? Did she go out with him? I don't know and it's driving me nuts. Especially since the same actor played a super evil necropheliac on the X-files and I don't want her to date a weirdo. I'm not even sure if that guy was "acting"...he's that weird. Stupid ABC Family.)

The Life Aquatic

The Aviator

I heart huckabees

and Porn...

Ha, just kidding. But I could now if I wanted to 'cause now no one would ever know.

Stacy and Lynne Like Lists

2005-06-23T21:58:00.000-05:00

Jess, Me, Mandy

Since Stacy did another 100 list, well, that means I have to 'cause I like to copy her.

I've decided to write a mesely 50 things and they are going to be about the Lynne of Yesteryear. I just realized my 10 year high schoo reunion is comming up. And when I say comming up I mean in about 2 years but I'm already freaking out because I'm really dreading it.

So in an attempt to use my blog as therapy here are 50 things about high school Lynne/things I did in high school/things I liked and hated in high school/etc.

1. Despite my the current shape my body was in, I was actually quite sporty in high school. I played Basketball, Volleyball, Softball, and ran Cross-Country.

2. I actually only ran Cross-Country one year because it conincided with the basketball season.

3. Yup. I did them at the same time my senior year. One night I ran a X-Country race and then played in a basketball game.

4. I was stupid in high school.

5. I played trumpet in the band.

6. I was bad at it.

7. I think it was because instead of a real trumpet my dad bought me a second-rate coronet. It's pretty much the same instrument but the psychological effects are undeniable.

8. The pictures above are of me and my two best friends in high school.

9. Jessica was better than me at trumnpet playing and Mandy was better than me at Volleyball.

10. I was the Vice President of my class. I don't know why. I didn't do anything. But this means I'll probebly have to be involved in the planning of the dreaded reunion.

11. I was on the homecomming court twice and I wore the same dress both times-gasp!

12. I only had 30 people in my graduating class-15 guys, 15 girls. Which I think explains #11.

13. I never dated in hich school until my senior year.

14. He was a year younger and he treated my poorly.

15. I skipped school...a lot.

16. I would sleep in and just go into school at 4th hour or go in on time and leave early.

17. If I had to stay there the whole day I would tell the teacher I forgot something in my car and I'd leave and go to the local gas station to buy skittles.

18. I didn't go to any real parties until senior year.

19. All the parties were in the woods-so the cops wouldn't find us drinking.

20. My friends and I would go paint other school's rocks before games. (do other state's schools have rocks?)

21. I got Ds in every math class.

22. I got kicked out of geometry class for talking too much.

23. I got kicked out of French class for talking too much.

24. This happened so much that my teacher would just send us to the library to do our work.

25. I got kicked out of the library for talking too loud.

26. I bought school lunch.

27. I picked up pop cans to buy gas. (yeah, gas used to be that cheap! I miss that!)

28. My first car was a 1984 Mazda that was super rusted, the doors didn't lock, and the gas gauge was broken.

29. My cousin and I skipped school once to buy homecomming dresses and it broke down about 70 miles from my house.

30. My parents were pissed when they had to come get us.

31. The next car I had was great. Then a drunk driver hit it. (If you look closely at the picture of me in the volleyball uniform you can see the bruises on my knees from the accident.)

32. During summers my friends would come to my place. We'd crank up the AC and sit around in sweat pants, sweat shirts, and blankets.

33. My first job was at an Ice Cream shop hooked to a convience store.

34. It was called the bear store and it actaully had a bear.

35. I always plotted to set it free. Mostly because all they fed the poor bear was expired bread and donuts from the store.

36. I think that bear died and they got a new one.

37. My parents always forced me to mow the lawn and I despised them for it. This is because our "lawn" was about 2 acres and required a tractor.

38. The tractor broke down constantly because it was so old. It was also so old that it was pink instead of it's original red.

39. I had an English class with someone from jail. They let him out to go to school.

40. That same english class had a guy who always came in high. He'd sit next to me and copy off me.

41. My friend Jennifer and I used to call a group of 4 guys the "Pansey Patrol".

42. This wasn't really mean. They all wore the same shirt to school one day and totally deserved it.

43. My favorite bands in high school were the Beatles, the Doors, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, and Smashing Pumpkins.

44. Our high school lunch lady was mean. (She's now Jessica's mother in law! ha!)

45. I wasn't popular but I was okay with it.

46. I'm pretty sure my biology teacher would leave class to go smoke. He'd disappear for about 20 minutes and return with blookshot eyes and smelly.

47. He then became the P.E. teacher. We played ping pong for an entire semester.

48. I fought with my mom constantly during high school.

49. I don't ever remember studying in high school but I still got okay grades.

50. I graduated in 1997.

Whew. That was tough. I'm sure I remember more than that but...who cares. It was sucky, sucky high school.

I Need Nunchuck Skills

2005-06-23T21:01:00.000-05:00

I've always wanted to take some type of martial arts class for fun but now I've decided it's a neccessity. It obviously increases a person's confidence level by 200%.

I think this because I took a visit to American U today to fill out some school paperwork and as I walked by the library there was a guy walking and practicing some sort of Tai Chi or Judo moves simultaneously-flailing arms and sounds effects and everything.

How do you get that kind of confidence? To just walk, flailing your arms about yelling "Hiyyyyya!" Can I do it without taking a class? Does it require massive amounts of alcohol before hand? Either way, I'm willing to participate.

ps-Maybe I don't have any confidence because I'm truely an idiot. My entire life I thought is was nuMchucks until now, when I googled the world to make sure I spelled it correctly on my blog and found it's actually nuNchucks!

It's Been Nice Knowing You...

2005-06-17T12:23:00.000-05:00

I just got my cell phone bill. It wasn't pretty-the damage was $260.00!!! Now I have to make sure I keep it hidden from Zak or you'll never hear from me again.

But I refuse to take total responsibility for this. It was his idea to get the voice-over IP system which took an extra long time to get here and set up because he accidently sent it to the wrong address thus leaving me with no form of communication except my cell phone. But I guess it was my fault that, even though I knew I was over my free minutes, I still proceeded to call friends and family during peak hours.

Even so, a person is allowed one horrendous phone bill in one's lifetime, right? I've always been good so this, I feel, is justified. I knew someone in high school who racked up an $800.00 phone bill...at least I'm not THAT bad.

Nervous Tummy

2005-06-15T09:52:00.000-05:00

A good trip to Minneaplolis must be good luck-I had a message about a job interview as soon as I got back.
I hate interviews though so maybe it was really bad luck. I never know what they're going to ask and I especially hate deciding what to wear. The interview was yesterday and I had the worst nervous stomach the whole day. Which reminds me, I also hate when interviews are in the afternoon versus the morning because I hate having all day to be worried and anal.

I think it went okay. I was fairly articulate. Except I do find that when I'm nervous I talk really fast and then abruptly stop and then clam up. It's a weird combination. But perhpas the worst part about the interview was the fact that I was dying of heat stroke! Of course the day I have an interview there has to be a heat advisory. Despite the heat I still had to wear my heavy black suit with the satin lining that forms an inpenatrable barrier once it bonds with gallons of sweat. It was disgusting. And of course that, coupled with taking public transportaion to the site assured that I had a nice funk that no perfume could mask.

So if they're looking for a stinky, sweaty shy fast talker...well, I'm their girl.

A Group Unlike Any Other

2005-06-13T10:30:00.000-05:00

...

I have yet to purchase a digital camera so I don't have any fun pictures to post of the wonderful people I met in Minneapolis but I'm sure it would look like this anyway. This weekend I had the pleasure of meeting HotBabe (and her roommate Jason), Stacy, PlanetDan (and his roommate K-Mack), Kiddo78 (and his friends Mandy and Tom), and BigDubb (and his wife Erin).

I had so much fun and everyone was so nice and they really are even funnier in person.
Friday I left DC at 6:30 am and arrived in Minneapolis at 12:30. HotBabe was kind enough to pick me up and let me stay at her place for the weekend. Let me tell you, it's a nice place to stay. Working air conditioner, comfy mattress, and instead of measly mints on your pillow you get a two litre of soda and a box of chocolates. I give it 5 stars.

Then I got to meet Stacy, who is so sweet, smart, and funny. But she's a bit of a liar. She kept telling me she was a bad conversationalists but she's really not. She can talk about anything at length and it's never boring. She also has an obsession with Irish music, which I am totally okay with since I love it too. She can also dance a pretty mean jig once you get a couple waters into her.
We went shopping in St. Paul and then met PlanetDan and his roomate Kris for dinner and drinks.
I can't say enough nice things about Dan and Kris. They were so nice and SO FUNNY!! And I'm not saying that just because they bought me dinner and many, many drinks.

Kiddo and his friends joined us next and we all went to various bars in St. Paul. Kiddo and his friends were also so nice and so funny. And again, I'm not just saying that because they bought me dinks too. The MN bloggers can sure play a mean game of bocce ball which is what we did until our teams started to disband due to injuries, beer/shot runs, and the need to make-out.

Then we all decided it was time to part. I said my goodbyes and HotBabe, Stacy, and I drove home. But not before a quick run to Burger King where HotBabe scored us free fries due to her heightened flirting abilities. No wonder the guy was in jail and on work release-I bet it wasn't the first time he'd stolen from his employer to give to a car full of drunk girls.

Saturday I woke up feeling pretty ill so HotBabe let me nap all day until Stacy joined us and we went to the infamous Mall of America. What can say...it's huge. Lots of fun stores including a place you can get fancy Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches. I was impressed. Then we went to a Greek Restaurant and stayed out way too late chating and laughing.

Sunday we got up and Stacy, HotBabe, and I met BigDubb and his wife at the Walker Gallery and Sculpture Garden. We saw wonderful works by some of my favorite artists such as Adrian Piper, Frank Stella, Amsel Kiefer, Robert Motherwell, and Mark Rothko. I enjoyed myself as I admired and bored all the others with my art history chit chat.
Then we went for ice cream at a yummy place BigDubb knew of. So good!!

My wonderful (and long awaited) trip the Blogger capitol of the world was sadly comming to an end. HotBabe took me to lunch and then we stopped by PlanetDan's (and Kris's) home (which is absolutly beautiful!) and I got to see where Dan writes all his hilarious posts (the highlight of the tour).

Then it was off to the airport. And now, I'm back in DC, still on a high due to all the wonderful people I met and the great things I did.

Thanks everybody. I had the best time!

I think my Roller Derby name would be Red Pepper

2005-06-08T21:16:00.000-05:00

The fishnet tights are a nice feminine touch.

I watched a story on CNN tonight about Roller Derby groups (such as this one)and I've decided I have to find a team in the area. I would be so good at this.

I miss roller skating. I used to do it all the time as a kid. My friends and I used to go to the local tennis courts (which were always empty since no one in my tiny town played tenis) and we'd take them over and use them as a skating rink. I even had a kick ass pair of skates that I had spray painted silver.

Of course you have to have a tough nickname to be on a roller derby team. The toughest I could think of was Red Pepper due to my red hair. Sure it doesn't sound so tough but if you really think about it...have you even chopped peppers and then touched your eyes. Whew. Watch out. That can smart for a couple hours!

I Heart Slatedotcom

2005-06-08T21:03:00.001-05:00

My husband has totally got me addicted to reading Slate Magazine online. Recently they had this article about inappropriate songs used in advertisments (such as CCR's anti-war "Fortunate Son" to sell jeans for uber-patriotic Wrangler and Tommy Hillfiger).

This reminded me of a game Zak and I like to play whenever we go to weddings which is to name to most inappropriate wedding songs (as well as to see what other inappropriate songs that people actually play).
So far out top 5 inappropriate wedding songs that we have yet to hear are:
"Better Man" by Pearl Jam
"Girls, Girls, Girls" by Motley Crue
"Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns N Roses
"Freebird" by Lynnard Skynnard
and "Tempted by the Fruit of Another" by Squezze.

The top 5 inappropriat songs we've actually heard at a wedding are:
"When Two Become One" by the Spice Girls (was played at my cousins wedding as they walked down the aisle after the ceremony. Look, I know you're going to do it tonight. I don't want to thing about it)
"Bohemian Rapsedy" by Queen (which was somehow palyed at my own reception and my in-laws tried to waltz to it)
"Way Down Yonder on the Chattahoochie" by Alan Jackson (because country sucks and it has the verse "hotter than a hoochie coochi". Gross)
"The Hokey Pokey" ('cause there's just something weird about sticking your whole self in)
"Everybody Dance Now" by C+C Music Factory (Not that it's really inappropriate but during my friends wedding her grandfather did dance to this in a wifebeater and tried to freak my sister and that's super inappropriate).

This is really a fun game. I suggest you try it the next time you're stuck at a crazy wedding.

I'm suprised I don't walk in constant circles...

2005-06-06T11:49:00.000-05:00

I know that everyone technically has one foot that is larger than the other but I now believe mine are grossly disproportionate. On Friday I found some cute shoes at Macy's that I decided to purchase for my upcomming trip to Minniapolis. I tried on the 8 1/2 and the 9. After walking aroung the place with both 9s on my feet I decided they were too big and the 8 1/2 must be the best fit. So I put one of the 8 1/2s on my feet and it fit like a glove. So I bought those. I did not realize my mistake untill I had them home and put on both. While the 8 1/2 fit perfectly on my left foot it was super tight on my right hoof! So now I have to try and stretch the right show so my toes don't scruntch up and I can stop limping when I wear them.
And of course I'm too stubborn to try and take them back or not wear them. Hell no! I'm wearing these shoes this Friday come Hell or high water.

Do Not Read if You Still Enjoy Salad-in-a-Bag

2005-06-01T21:54:00.000-05:00

I'm so sad. One of the only ways I eat healthy is through pre-packaged bag salad and now that has been ruined. Today I made a nice salad with dinner and was happily enjoying it when I happened across a dead lady-bug mid bite. Well, I don't know if they're really ladybugs-it was one of those weird orange ones. It was all curled up as if it had succumb to suffocation-probebly due to being packaged into an airtight bag.
It's weird how those bugs seem to pop up everywhere. My run-in reminds me of the first time my sister-in-law visited my home town. Luckily I wasn't there to witness this or I'd never be able to eat stove top stuffing again. (I think you know where I'm going with this.) My parents were going to my Aunt and Uncle's house for Thanksgiving dinner so my brother and sister-in-law had to go along. It was really the worst place for a first visit since we've always had a sibling "rule" to never eat anything that has been made in their house. Anyways. There were those weird lady-bug thingys covering the stuffing and no one noticed except my poor, poor sister-in-law.
So that's all it takes to put me off salad (and stuffing). I'm either going to have to stop being so lazy and actually use real lettuce and make salads myself or find another way to balance my diet.
Stupid fake ladybugs.